My mom is an ordinary Dafa practitioner. Since June 2000, she has had to live the life of a refugee, and no one knows where she is now. Her heart and her actions have proven that Dafa is sacred and grand.
Originally, my mom practiced Falun Gong because she wanted to cure her illnesses. Before becoming a practitioner, she was an atheist. She had had a hard life, and the hardship had made her very sick, and it had turned her life meaningless. She was so sick that she had to stay at home from the young age of forty. She often saw herself on the verge of dying.
I felt sad for my mom. I tried many ways to please her, but each time I tried, I failed. I even thought that maybe money would be able to change everything. But then I realized that even if money could give my mom a comfortable life, it could not change her attitude towards life nor give her a healthy body.
Then, she got a book called Zhuan Falun and started reading it. When I learned about this, I told her to be careful and not to be conned by the practice. Soon after I said this, she traveled to the south and started living with me. I saw her begin to do the meditation exercises. Out of curiosity, I once attended an experience sharing conference, and even tried to do the exercises, too. I imitated the people, but in my heart, I didn't really take the practice seriously. While I was doing the meditation, I had my eyes open, watching all kinds of interesting people who came to practice.
One day, I found out how miraculous Falun Gong really was, when Mom's body was being purified. Before practicing Dafa, she often had low grade fevers. This time, she had a high fever. I wanted to take her to the doctor but she refused, and she said that it was just her karma being removed. I worried about her, but couldn't force her to do anything. It turned out that Mom was fine; she recovered two days later.
Meanwhile, it was my turn to have a high fever, and this was really unexpected! I was seldom sick or had high fevers. In fact, on the day when I got the high fever, I was just coming home from a doctor's check-up, and the doctor told me that everything was fine. But I felt very uncomfortable, and had to lie down in bed. Mom started reading Zhuan Falun to me, but as she saw that I was getting worse, she asked if I wanted to see a doctor. I decided to go to the hospital. The doctor gave me an injection. Well, the needle did not get pushed out in the way it was described in the book, so I said to Mom that maybe Master Li didn't regard me as a practitioner, and wasn't taking care of me. But the second day, I found that my whole body was covered with red dots except for my face and my hands. I was never allergic to anything, and besides, the doctor did some tests before he gave me an injection. I was convinced that what the book said was true. I still remember the day I finished Zhuan Falun, I dreamed about many little faluns rotating around my body. At the time, I thought that it was just a dream, so I didn't pay any attention to it. But this time I changed my attitude towards my "sickness." I didn't see the doctor, nor did I take any medicine, and I recovered very quickly.
However, I was still holding on tightly to many human notions. Although I had seen many miracles, and even experienced many things myself, I still had doubts about Dafa. Gradually, I came to realize that it was those notions that separated myself from Dafa. Now that I look back, I could see myself being completely lost in a maze.
Mom became a confident and committed Dafa practitioner. She changed a lot. Everyone liked her and felt that she was almost like a saint and that she was a kindhearted person. No one could imagine how bad-tempered she had been or how miserable she had felt before. Mom's life had been full of misfortune when she was young. Her family was poor, her father died very early, and she was given away for adoption. When she was in her twenties, the best years of one's life according to many people, she was sent to the countryside and remained there for ten years. By the time she came back to the city, she found out that her husband, that is, my father, was involved in a relationship with somebody else. They finally got a divorce after a few years, something that was still frowned upon in society during those times. In the early nineties, one of my brothers died in an accident. With all these things happening, my mom became old and sick, and her heart was full of hatred, especially towards my father. At that time, if we contacted our father, we would not dare to let Mom know.
Since Mom started practicing Falun Gong, she became easy-going and open-minded. She came to understand a lot of things. My brother no longer needed to rush her to the emergency room anymore. Most surprisingly, she began to keep contact with Dad, and took on the responsibility of taking care of my grandpa and grandma. She also made an effort to repair her previously broken relationship with her in-laws. All these things enabled me to again experience the warmth and love of family life, which I had longed for since childhood. It was Dafa that changed my mom. My mom started a new life, which subsequently brought happiness to all of us. No more hatred and no more quarrels! All these wonderful changes made every member of our family feel the miraculous power of Dafa.
But soon this peaceful cultivation environment was over. The unprecedented persecution against Dafa started to take place. On April 25, 1999, Mom appealed, with a pure heart, to the highest authorities for help, although my husband and I kept warning her that the Chinese government would take a harsher approach in suppressing Falun Gong practitioners (although at that time we didn't realize the suppression would become as severe as it has). Mom became a little hesitant, but remained calm and unmoved. Using their wisdom, many practitioners successfully stayed away from the police.
As a result of the situation, I had many opportunities to meet a lot of practitioners from overseas. I heard many touching stories. I came to realize that Dafa has given everyone a new life. I was really touched by their sincere heart towards Master Li's teachings, and their determination to cultivate. Having had frequent contact with these practitioners, and seeing how the Chinese government escalated its horrible persecution against Dafa, I gradually took cultivation seriously. I thought of what I had done and said in the past. I started to realize that the karma I had accumulated was enormous. I did many things I shouldn't have done. I wasn't even sure if I was still qualified to be a practitioner. All these things prompted me to make a change. As soon as I arrived in Canada, the first thing I wanted to do was to find a practice site in my neighbourhood. It became clear to me that it was because I publicly supported Dafa when I was in Beijing that Master Li gave me one opportunity after another, and helped me overcome difficulties so that I could genuinely practice cultivation. I became a genuine Dafa practitioner the day I left China.
Being in that extremely evil environment, Mom still faithfully continues her cultivation. When Mom went back home two months after leaving, group study was resumed at my home. Local practitioners came over regularly to read and share experiences. Mom felt that she was more determined than ever despite all the difficulties. A few things helped my mom a lot to develop her determination. First, Mom had more contact with practitioners in Beijing than before. Secondly, she could read the latest news and stories on the Clearwisdom website more regularly. In addition, she could also find out what has been going on overseas through me. All these things enabled her to distinguish what was true from what was untrue, and which scripture was genuine and which was fabricated.
One day, a friendly person called Mom and told her that her phone was being tapped. Mom sensed that she would be undergoing a major test. Soon it proved that she was right. It happened one evening in late June of last year. Some police officers pretended that they were security guards checking around the building. They wanted to come into her house. Mom reluctantly opened the door, but none of them recognized her, so she slipped out of the door when she had the chance. From that day on, she started her homeless life. She hasn't returned home ever since. Twice she was almost arrested, but managed to slip away. I think she was being protected by Master Li. The first time this happened, the police were out searching for her at around 9 PM, a time when she usually went out to do meditation. But on that particular day, she didn't go out at all because my brother said he was coming for supper. Not finding her outside, the police officers pretended to be superintendents wanting to collect maintenance fees. Mom was not fooled, and managed to run away from them. It looked as if everything was a coincidence, but we all know that it was not. The second time my Mom managed to run away from danger was when my brother found her and tried to turn her over to the police. Apparently, he was being paged non-stop, and had been detained for 48 hours by the police. They didn't let him sleep. My brother is not a practitioner, and so he couldn't put up with the pressure. He had no choice but to betray Mom.
For almost a year now, Mom seldom contacts me. Most of the time I don't know where she is or what is happening to her. She contacted me a couple of months ago and told me that she has gone through many things: Practicing cultivation alone, and wandering around to clarify the truth. She feels sad and lonely as she couldn't get in touch with other practitioners and couldn't read Master Li's new articles or the news on the Clearwisdom website. The only things she could rely on were her righteous mind, and her firm belief in Dafa. She indulges herself in reading and practicing the exercises. She came to understand that what she has gone through was really nothing compared with the hardship and tortures endured by all those practitioners in jails and detention centers. It was not easy for Mom to face all those things. In comparison, I have a comfortable cultivation environment here, but I still need to communicate with practitioners or visit the Clearwisdom website to keep my mind clear.
Mom is not considered a particularly intelligent person. She didn't seem to be able to grasp the essence of what she read in the book as quickly as myself, even when I wasn't a practitioner. In addition, except for the change in her philosophy of life and health, Mom never mentioned whether her celestial eye was open and thus able to verify Dafa directly. But she always follows Master Li's teachings she reads more, studies the Fa more, and makes use of every minute to cultivate. When she saw how reluctant I was to take steps in cultivation, she often used Master Li's words "cultivation is serious," to help me, and I did notice that Mom was indeed very serious about cultivation. Even though sometimes she doesn't understand Master Li's words, she can deal with everything seriously according to her understanding and conducts herself according to the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Tolerance. Since Mom started practicing Dafa, she truly got rid of a lot of human attachments as well as hatred, which had been hidden in her mind for many years. She became much more tolerant and patient.
However, sentimentality was still a big obstacle for her. Mom loved my older brother very much, so she felt much pain when he died seven years ago. After that, my younger brother became the center of my family, and the whole family got very nervous when anything happened to him. When Mom left home, my brother's young daughter was only two months old. My mom already had the intention of leading her to the way of cultivation when she was still in her mother's womb, though Mom said she was aware that this intention was a human attachment. My younger brother seemed to be affected by Dafa a lot, even though he did not practice cultivation. In my mom's absence, he had to bear all the hardships by himself. Many of our relatives cannot understand why things are the way they are, and even some practitioners have tried to persuade Mom to return home. But Mom is not being afraid of being arrested. She is merely following faithfully her understanding a practitioner should not accept the arrangement by the evil. Some local policemen put strong pressure on my brother and lied to him by saying that they would not harm my mom if she came back home and signed a renouncement letter.
By letting go of the strong sentimentality, once again, Mom decided to leave home. She didn't tell me the details about what she had come across in the past year, and how she clarified Dafa as a Dafa particle during the Fa rectification period. But I do know that she's already eliminated the stubborn attachment of sentimentality, given up the comfortable family life, abandoned the attachment to money, and led a wandering life. In spite of all the difficulties, Mom donated thousands of Yuan to buy a photocopy machine. She tried her best with other practitioners to "expose the evil and clarify the truth." Seeing how she tried to go through all the difficulties in her life, some friends, and even myself, advised her to go abroad. But Mom said she had thought about it, but decided not to leave China because, as she said, "It doesn't matter where I practice as long as I'm determined to cultivate. I won't go home until Dafa is rectified." I can feel the strength and courage that Dafa gives her. I know that there are a lot of practitioners who are just like my Mom in China. They are determined to cultivate, not afraid of the evil, and never compromise. They are trying their best to be Dafa particles during the Fa rectification period.
For a period of time, I worried that Mom might give up cultivation under pressure. She was a well-known practitioner in her workplace, and her phone-calls and emails were monitored by local police. My residence abroad has certainly made the police more suspicious of her. But it turned out that she didn't give up at all. Furthermore, she has used her wisdom to clarify the truth to the public ever since the persecution began. Lately, I heard that she was caught and sentenced to jail for one year. "She simply doesn't give up," said my grandma. My aunt who is also a practitioner has been put into jail for three months now. Last month, I heard from some reliable sources that my mom had been arrested, but nobody knows her whereabouts and what's been happening to her.
My grandmother is sad because both her daughters have been arrested. She still suffers, but she knows how precious Dafa is. Now she is taking on the responsibility of taking care of my aunt's child. Nowadays, in China, thousands of practitioners and their families are going through the same thing.
I came to understand the deeper meaning of hardship and suffering. I used to be afraid, anxious, and angry. Now, all the endurance shown by those practitioners under the brutal persecution have helped me understand Dafa better, and I have become more steadfast in conforming to the universal principle of Truth-Compassion-Tolerance.
I am no longer afraid of what I have heard. Instead, I'm deeply touched by the stage of selflessness that my Mom and other practitioners have reached. They are able to give up what everyday people are attached to, and they make every effort to let those who have been clouded by lies to have a chance to see the principle of the universe. Their sacrifice is a simple wish, a wish to see good people hear about Dafa so they can have a wonderful future.
Facing the persecution, every practitioner with the knowing heart should realize that the security and comfort they are holding on to are only temporary. Although it seems that a less troublesome life could be traded with a signature on a renouncement letter, the real treasure that Dafa and Master Li bring to all practitioners is priceless and can never be measured with anything in the world.
How could practitioners imagine giving up their belief in Master and Dafa, which can bring ever-lasting blessings to them, and to every sentient being?!
More and more people have come to support Falun Dafa practitioners. It's touching to hear my husband telling me that Mom and Aunt are really remarkable. And that's from the bottom of the heart of a non-practitioner, who has even found our behavior inconceivable.
My grandma said to me one day, "Your mother will come back alive. She is a good person." She knows all the tribulations are the result of Jiang Zemin.
Thank you Master Li, you have given hope to all of us, and released us from being eliminated.
Thank you for all the tribulations that you bear for all human beings.
Thank you Mom for guiding me, and helping me to begin my cultivation, which has made my life more meaningful than ever.
And thanks to all the genuine cultivators both in China, and overseas.
Thanks to you all!
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