Hebei Falun Dafa Practitioner Li Zilian (Pseudonym)

[Minghui Net]

Since July 1999 when the Chinese government began to persecute Falun Dafa, it has been my wish to go to Beijing to validate Dafa. However, impeded by fear and other attachments, I couldn't realize my intention. I only stayed within the local area and distributed some truth-clarifying flyers. 

In March 2001, my husband was arrested and sent to a detention center for practicing Falun Dafa. For the past two months, I have been taking care of my two children who have to go to school, and I have been doing this all by myself. During this time I thought, "I have been cultivating Dafa for several years, yet how come I do not have the ability to endure this tribulation? I should never fall down. No matter how miserable and difficult a test is, I should go through it." I often silently recited Teacher's verses to encourage myself. Relying on my firm belief in Dafa, I went through these two difficult months. But I felt so tired and I endured it in a very passive way. 

One day, I read an article on Minghui Net that really touched me. One paragraph had a meaning to the effect that, "Some of our practitioners feel it more and more difficult to endure. Their fear gets stronger and stronger, and they even beg Teacher to eliminate more tribulations for them. When one feels it difficult to walk by himself, how can he take care of others?" After reading this article, I felt I was in the same state of mind. This article was simply talking about me. I thought it was by no means accidental that I got the chance to read this article. I made a decision to step out of this state of mind. I should not endure these tribulations passively. I should follow up with Teacher's Fa-rectification process. After repeatedly studying Teacher's new articles and the experience-sharing articles written by fellow practitioners who joined in rectifying the Fa, I thought I should go to Beijing to validate the Fa. 

I talked to my children about my thoughts. They both supported me but felt a little bit worried. The first difficulty was: "Where can I find a banner?" One practitioner reminded me, "You can write it by yourself. It does not matter whether the handwriting is good or not. The most important thing is your heart." After I went home, I quickly made a banner that read, "Falun Dafa is good!" These words were written in red on a yellow background. This really encouraged me to go to Beijing. I thought that if I did it with my pure heart, it would be successful. When the banner was ready, the next step was to find a fellow practitioner to go with me, since I seldom went out by myself. I waited for one day, but when I could not find another practitioner to go with me, I thought that I should not wait any longer. I should go all by myself. It was probably arranged by Teacher this way. I made the decision to go on May 19, a Sunday. On the evening of the 18^th, I prepared everything, and repeatedly practiced how I would quickly unfold the banner. My two children kept saying, "Mom, you should unfold the banners and not act like a coward. You should not be brainwashed by them." I told them to feel at ease. I knew what to do. How can a human being brainwash a god? I knew I was going to Beijing to validate Dafa and eradicate the evil, and not to be detained and reeducated in a labor camp. Before I started, I sent out my righteous thoughts, and pleaded with Teacher, asking that all the Gong and the living beings cultivated by me and all the gods that safeguard the Fa would protect me when I went to Tiananmen Square, so that I would be able to safely unfold the banner. On the early morning of May 19, I left my home and successfully stepped onto the train heading for Beijing. In the train, I felt excited and calm. I felt excited because I would soon realize my wish, which I had cherished for two years. I felt calm because I didn't feel nervous or afraid. Instead, I had a feeling that both my body and mind were light-hearted and happy.  

At around 10:00 am, I reached Tiananmen Square. Since it was the first time I had been to Beijing, I wandered about and waited for my chance. I did not find any other practitioners who wanted to unfold banners. I thought that even if I was all by myself, I should unfurl the banner. After all, why had I come here? I knew I was there to pass the test of life and death and to validate the Fa. At that moment, I did not have any feelings of fear. To the right side of the national flag, there was a foreign tourist group that was leaving after taking pictures. I unfolded the banner immediately, and shouted, "Falun Dafa is good." "Falun Dafa is the righteous Fa." Very quickly, policemen dressed in plainclothes were upon me. They seized me by the throat and pulled me by the hair towards the police van. I kept shouting, "Restore the reputation of Falun Dafa. Restore the reputation of my Teacher." At this moment, my throat was seized more tightly. I was dragged into the police van. They shut the window and closed the curtains. I was pushed down onto the last row of seats. They asked me for the banner, and I refused to give it to them. Two policemen beat me while cursing at me. They poured water into my ear and spit on my face. I told them kind-heartedly, "You should not beat people. When you persecute Dafa practitioners, you are actually persecuting yourself. And you will then deserve retribution." One policeman answered, "I am willing to receive the retribution." When they felt tired after beating me, they sat down in the front row. I stepped forward and tried to open the window and shout. I was dragged by the policemen to the back row, and again beaten ruthlessly. 

When the van reached the Tiananmen Police Sub-station, a policeman kicked me out of the van, and I shouted again, "Falun Dafa is good." I was kicked all the way to the Public Security Bureau. Someone inside asked, "Why are you here?" Someone else replied, "[She is a] Falun Gong [practitioner]." Immediately four or five policemen came out and dragged me into the steel cage. They separated my two hands and handcuffed them onto the steel balustrades. Again, they brutally beat me and snatched away my banner. After beating me, they dragged me outside and handcuffed me to the chair in the lobby. No one paid any attention to me until the evening when they finished their dinner. They dragged me into a room. First they asked me to fill out a form. I said I could not write and with determination I refused to co-operate with them. One policeman pulled me up from the chair by the hair in exasperation and slapped me in the face. I told him, "You should not treat Falun Dafa practitioners like this. You will receive retribution. If you do not awaken, you will all go to hell." He said, "I am willing to, I hate your Falun Gong." Two of them brought with them police batons, and also a bottle of some kind of liquid medicine. Several of them held me down and applied the medicine under my nose. A very strong whiff of it got into my nose. I stopped breathing, and figured that the medicine would only effect ordinary people, not a practitioner like me. They applied the medicine to the surrounding area of my eyes and said, "We'll put this special liquid medicine on you so that your flesh will gradually fester." Another two policemen came over again. They pressed me down to the table and used a policeman's baton to brutally beat me on my back and bottom. They did not stop until they felt tired. They said that they would continue to beat me the next day. They dragged me out and handcuffed me to the chair again. 

On the 20^th, two fellow practitioners were brought in. We were forcefully taken away to the Zhangjiakou Office stationed in Beijing. There we were robbed of our money. We stayed one night in the office. On the morning of the 21^st, they unlocked our handcuffs and let us wash our faces and relax a little bit. One practitioner was taken away. The other practitioner and I were left without handcuffs. Three male policemen were watching us, and we thought about how we could escape from the evil force's control. The fellow practitioner thought that it would be good if two of the three policemen left. After a while, two of them really did go somewhere, leaving only one man to watch us. My fellow practitioner stood up and made a gesture to me before stepping onto the windowsill and opening the window. Seeing this, the policeman went to pull her down. I also stepped up to the windowsill. I opened the window and looked down. We were on the second floor. I jumped down, got up quickly and found that I was okay. I ran along the building, towards the outside of the hostel. When I ran out of the door of the hostel, someone was running up behind me. When I came to the intersection, I called for a taxi. But just as I opened the door of the taxi, I was caught and dragged back.  

Some passersby were watching. I shouted loudly, "Falun Dafa is good!" I was dragged back to the basement. The moment I came into the basement room, they slapped me hard on the face. My left eye swelled up immediately. I was handcuffed again. Then, I heard someone outside also shouting: "Falun Dafa is good." My fellow practitioner was also caught and brought back. Though we did not succeed in escaping, we dealt the evil force a heavy blow. The three policemen who were watching us felt scared. They gasped for breath and shivered all over their bodies. One of them said, "If you ran into danger, isn't it as good as 'smashing your rice bowls' [A Chinese statement that means 'lose one's job']?" The fellow practitioner told him with righteous words that, "We were not committing suicide. We just wanted to free ourselves from the evil's control. We did nothing wrong in practicing the exercises and appealing. Why did you lock us up?" 

We were handcuffed and dragged into the police van separately. Our eyes were covered. I got car-sick and vomited on the way. At about 4:00 pm, we were sent to the Huailai Detention Center in Hebei province. At that time, our condition really scared them: my left eye was swollen, there were black and blue bruises on my arms, back, bottom, and legs, and I was vomiting. Also, the other practitioner could not stand up and her back was beaten and injured. There, they asked us to tell them our names and addresses. We refused and demanded our immediate release. We told them that we would sacrifice our lives by going on a hunger strike until they released us. As a result, on the morning of the 23^rd we were released, and our money and belongings were returned to us. 

This five-day experience of safeguarding the Fa enlightened me to many principles. If we have our hearts in conformity with the Fa, refuse to co-operate with the evil under any circumstance, and have the courage to leave behind the issue of life and death, the retributions may not necessarily be big. Our cultivation roads are actually arranged by Teacher, and we are not supposed to be locked up by the evil. What really matter are the human notions that have been impeding us. We dared not go to Beijing because we thought that if we went we would surely be locked up and brainwashed. 

The above is only some of my personal experience. Since it was the first time that I went to Beijing, I did not do everything well enough and this should be improved upon. The purpose of this article is to share my experiences with those fellow practitioners who have not come out yet. If you dare to leave behind the issue of life and death, there is nothing to fear. Teacher arranges everything for us. What really matters is our heart. 

If there is anything improper, fellow practitioners, please kindly point it out and rectify it. 

Posting date: 7/6/2001
Original article date: 7/5/2001
Category: Experience Sharing
Translated on 7/4/2001
Chinese version available at http://www.minghui.ca/mh/articles/2001/6/24/12436.html

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