Gradually Cultivating to Completion
By a New York Practitioner
(Clearwisdom.net) I obtained the Fa in June of 1999---just one month
before the persecution began in China. I learned about Falun Gong from a good
friend of mine. Through diligent studying of the Dafa books and emphasis on
xinxing cultivation, the quality of my life now is infinitely better than it was
before. I've also gained a great deal of respect for Teacher and I am confident
that the teachings in Zhuan Falun can guide me back to my original True
Self.
I would now like to share a few of my recent cultivation experiences and
limited understandings. I appreciate any comments and corrections that will help
me improve.
I. Balancing Fa Study and Fa Rectification Work
Many Dafa practitioners have found that the pace of Fa Rectification is
getting faster and faster, and get involved in many different teams. Personally,
I felt that I had good intentions for not going to group activities and Fa-study
section thinking that I should be "putting Dafa before myself" and do
my Dafa work first. However, my Dafa work seemed endless, and many times my Fa
Study would be put off until the next day.
One day about 3 months ago I decided that I would make my Fa Study the top
priority everyday. I decided that I wouldn't start any Dafa work until I
finished my reading for the day. I'm sure you can tell what the results were---I
was able to do my Dafa work as a Dafa practitioner and thus it was done much
faster and with much higher quality.
In hindsite, I experienced exactly what Master said in the 2002 Florida
Conference: "But there's one thing: you must achieve the state of
studying the Fa without any pursuit. You understood this a long time ago--you
can't read the Fa with an attachment to solving your problems. Just read calmly,
and the effect is sure to be excellent."
I think most of us know what we need to do; it's now just an issue of being
diligent. Once all the Dafa particles rise up, then the cultivation environment
will follow.
II. Working With Others on Dafa Projects, Having True Compassion And
Overcoming The Attachment to Fame.
Master said in the Lecture at the Conference in Singapore in 1998, "Not
only should the two people with the friction examine themselves, but also the
bystanders who happen to observe the incident should examine themselves."
In each case, I have been aware that I should look within myself, however, I
rarely would enlighten to my shortcomings. Gradually, I started to see a
trend---in each case when a conflict arose between two practitioners, I usually
could tell what attachments they had that caused the conflict, yet I would never
reveal this to either of them. My excuse was that I should just be looking
within and that they needed enlighten to their attachments on their own. While
this was partially true, eventually I realized that my decision to not do
anything was a manifestation of my deeply rooted attachment to Fame and Gain. In
short, I'm afraid of pointing out other practitioner's attachments because I
fear that they will become angry with me or think that I'm not a nice person. I
know this sounds funny, but as a Westerner growing up in America, this is a
strong degenerate notion that many kids acquire while in school. In addition, I
have realized that I need to be more selfless and compassionate.
Through these complicated scenarios between practitioners, I have seen many of
my attachments that otherwise would have remained hidden. Master says in Ch. 4
(pg. 159) of Zhuan Falun: "You will be made to abandon all those
attachments that cannot be given up among everyday people. As long as you have
them, all of those attachments must be removed in different environments. You
will be made to stumble, whereby you will become enlightened to the Tao. This is
how one goes through cultivation practice."
III. Reading Clearwisdom.net and Sending Forth Righteous Thoughts.
When Master first introduced us to "sending forth righteous
thoughts", I did believe that I had the potential to use supernormal
capabilities in other dimensions, however, I had no idea if and when they were
actually working. I tried my best to follow closely the instructions on
Clearwisdom.net, but I had no indication that what I was doing was having any
effect.
Shortly after we starting "sending forth righteous thoughts" at set
times, it became very difficult for me to work on Dafa projects at home. I had a
very difficult time concentrating and many of my old attachments that I thought
I had disposed of were re-surfacing. My human thinking kicked in and I started
to think that I was just working too much and needed a break, or perhaps that I
needed to do some "ordinary human things" to balance myself.
By accident, one day while installing some software on my wife's computer, I
came across a video game. When I was a kid, I was strongly attached to video
games, however, I was very certain that this attachment was gone. I decided to
give it a quick try to check out how good video games are these days, and I
ended up becoming quickly addicted to it.
Over the next week, in a very uncontrolled manner, I indulged even deeper
into my attachment by going on the Internet to find more video games---and there
were so many free games! Part of me, knew the entire time, that what I was doing
was very wrong, yet my human side kept dragging me deeper into my attachment.
I'm not sure if this was arranged, but something very fortunate happened which
helped me to start regularly reading the articles on Clearwisdom.net. In the
past, I rarely read Clearwisdom.net and used the excuse that I was too busy, and
that if I was going to spend any spare time reading, it should be for reading
Dafa books. One day, because I was tired of typing so many emails, I decided to
look for some speech recognition software. My search was unsuccessful, but
instead, I came across a screen reader program that could read, out loud, text
on the screen. I decided to have it read a few Clearwisdom articles while I
cleaned up our apartment. Since I've always been a much better listener than a
reader, this turned out to be an excellent thing and soon I was listening to all
the Clearwisdom articles everyday. The articles helped me tremendously in my
cultivation and at the same time, our apartment became a lot cleaner!
Seriously, the Clearwisdom articles helped me overcome many obstacles in my
cultivation and helped greatly improve my understanding of several profound Fa
principles. My understanding of Fa-Rectification and the situation in China
improved and I gained new appreciation for the amazing courage and forbearance
that the practitioners in China have displayed. Furthermore, the articles help
me better understand the current direction of Fa-Rectification. I now try to
listen to at least a few articles everyday before I start my Dafa work.
I highly recommend that all practitioners regularly read, or perhaps listen
to, clearwisdom.net---I now feel that I would be "in the dark" without
it. After listening to several Clearwisdom articles on "Sending Forth
Righteous Thoughts", I realized that I should take my attachments more
seriously. As recommend in a few articles, I started to send forth righteous
thoughts every hour. To remind myself, I set an alarm on my computer to go off
every hour. After a few days, I became much clearer while working and I quickly
discarded my attachment to video games.
My limited understanding of this experience is that the evil forces were
using my attachment to cause me to stop participating in Fa Rectification and to
make me fail in cultivation. If I did not have the omission in the first place,
the evil forces would not have been able to effect me at all. Through the
process of clearing out bad thoughts and karma, and then sending forth righteous
thoughts, it made it impossible for the evil to amplify my attachments, and
thus, I was able to be clearheaded and remove it.
Conclusion
I have a strong feeling that this precious period of the Fa Rectification
Disciples is coming to an end and I thus hope all practitioners can strive
forward diligently. I have finally begun to realize what Teacher means in the
last paragraph of Ch. 1 in Zhuan Falun: "At present, no other
person is truly teaching people toward high levels like me. In the future you
will realize what I have done for you."
I know that none of this would be possible without Teacher's infinite
compassion---and even when it appears that we are doing work for Teacher and
Dafa, it is all really arranged for our own consummation. I feel that the only
way to show appreciation for Teacher is to strive forth diligently, complete
cultivation and return back to our original true selves.
Chinese version available at
http://minghui.org/mh/articles/2002/2/19/25290.html
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