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Finding the Root of My Inferiority Complex By a Dafa Disciple in China (Clearwisdom.net) Since July 20, 1999, when the persecution of Falun Gong
started in China, I have been beaten, fined, detained, and brainwashed. Due to
not studying the Fa enough, I was so limited in my thinking. I did not have a
clear understanding of the principles of the Fa, and when I was tortured and
persecuted, I could not handle it with righteous thoughts. I did not measure the
torture and persecution with the standard of the Fa. In the end, I did many
things that a Dafa disciple should not have done. Because I had so many strong
and intense attachments, I had been following the path arranged by the old evil
forces and could not recognize the fact that I was doing so. It was only after I
took part in an experience sharing with other practitioners and when I searched
within myself, that I finally enlightened to the principles of the Fa: No matter
what tribulations I may experience, I must study the Fa well, search within
myself and completely deny the arrangements made by the old evil forces. Because I had stumbled many times during the progress of Fa-rectification, I
had developed an intense inferiority complex. This mentality of inferiority was
like a huge stone weighing on my heart. Through sharing experiences with fellow
practitioners, I understood that the old evil forces are using this approach to
drive practitioners who have not done well during the progress of Fa-Rectification
to develop this intense attachment. It is also very difficult for practitioners
to let go of this attachment once it is developed; hence these practitioners are
trapped and suffer in the attachment of inferiority for quite a long time.
Today, I was finally able to trace the root of this attachment that caused my
inferiority complex. This attachment was not created because I had not done a
good job during the progress of Fa-rectification, rather it was because of my
selfishness. If I had not recognized this deeply rooted attachment of
selfishness, it would have been very difficult for me to let go of the
inferiority complex. When I finally recognized my selfishness and understood
this principle of the Fa, I felt that my heart was all of a sudden relaxed; I
felt the mighty power of the Fa, as well as how broad and immense the Fa is; the
arrangements of the old evil forces no longer affected me. Through studying the Fa, I develop deeper understandings of how compassionate
Teacher is to practitioners who have not cultivated themselves well during the
progress of Fa-rectification. Posting date: 7/10/2003
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