(Clearwisdom.net)

During a long period of Fa study and cultivation practice, I found myself often thinking, "I need to take a break." Meanwhile, a variety of everyday people's attachments came back, so I might start doing things like watching TV, reading the newspapers and other periodicals, having a conversation with somebody about common things, and the like. Whenever I did that, my xinxing level unconsciously dropped down to the same as that of everyday people and this directly influenced the progress of my cultivation practice.

Teacher said: "You should be strict with yourself." (Zhuan Falun) I found that I did not meet the standards of strictness required of me, so I couldn't understand the Fa from the standpoint of the Fa all the time and couldn't appreciate the urgency of the present situation. I couldn't tell whether or not my thoughts and conduct met the standard of the Fa or whether they embodied the honesty, holiness and purity of a Dafa disciple and Dafa particle. The negative conditions disturbed me, so I couldn't quietly study the Fa and always daydreamed. Teacher said: "You have to be clearheaded at this solemn present moment." ("Drive Out Interference") My head wasn't clear!

Another negative effect was that I came to have the attachment to ease and comfort, so when I did Dafa work and activities for clarifying the truth about Dafa to save the world's people, the result sometimes turned out good and sometimes bad.

Teacher's lecture entitled, "Fa-Rectification Period Dafa Disciples" explains this issue very clearly. I wasn't being responsible for myself and was not respectful to our Teacher. I also didn't show the compassion and righteous thoughts and righteous conduct of a Fa-rectification period Dafa disciple. "Cultivation practice is extremely arduous and very serious. If you are careless for a moment, you may stumble and become ruined at once. Therefore, one's mind must be right." (Zhuan Falun) I decided to rededicate myself to the Fa and found the result was quite good.

At first, when I went out to paste up the materials explaining the truth about Dafa, I was excited and also scared. After I had done this a few times, the sense of fear was gradually eliminated. The more places I went, the more experiences I accumulated. I realized the huge difference between Fa-rectification period Dafa disciples and individual cultivation practice. If I stayed at home, I would never have understood the greatness and magnificence of saving the world's people. I often thought that if I could save one person, what I did was still not for naught; if I stayed at home, I could accomplish nothing.

While doing Dafa work, I looked back over the road I had traveled and found out I had made mistakes, but the damage done was too extensive to be undone. It is left for the future to ponder these errors so that we don't lose time and do our best to clarify the facts about Dafa.

Posting date: 8/18/2003
Original article date: 8/17/2003
Category: Practitioners' Insights
Translated on 8/6/2003
Chinese version available at http://minghui.org/mh/articles/2003/7/31/54855.html

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