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I Am a Disciple of Master Li Hongzhi (Part III)
By a Falun Dafa practitioner from Jilin Province (Clearwisdom.net)
(Continued) Part 1: http://www.clearwisdom.net/emh/articles/2004/11/10/54378.html
As a disciple of Li Hongzhi
After I was sent to the forced labor camp, I didn't have the anxious feeling
of getting trapped. Instead, I had only one pure thought in my mind, "I'm a
disciple of the Li Hongzhi. Nobody is able to hurt me. And I don't allow my
omissions to be taken advantage of since people would commit crimes against the
Fa when they are used by the evil to persecute me."
I was assigned to Squad Two. Somehow people in there seemed familiar to me. I
smiled at them while sending forth righteous thoughts. My compassion rose up. I
felt sorry for them, especially those people who "enlightened" along
an evil path. They had a tag on their arms and they had the freedom to walk
around.
That night, I had a dream. In my dream, I saw black water and black mud
everywhere. All the people were struggling in the mud. They had mud all over
their bodies as if they were made of mud. However, the mud on their face
couldn't cover their expressions of pain. I saw myself in white and I crossed a
river easily. I looked at myself. There weren't any stains on me. In my dream, I
came to realize that my pure thought had laid a solid foundation for me to
strive forward in this special environment. Teacher kindly let me see the final
results of my being imprisoned. I quietly promised to Teacher, "Yes, I will
do a good job here. I will be a qualified true Falun Dafa disciple."
The next day, Yi X, who was responsible for reforming practitioners, came to
me. She said she would gather a few people to "help" me. I said,
"No problem. Bring as many as you want." Yi said, "You're
different. Others were afraid to talk to us." I smiled while sending forth
righteous thoughts to eliminate the evil elements that were controlling them.
After a while, over ten people came. I smiled. I told them my dream that I had
the night before while sending forth righteous thoughts. Yi asked, "What
does it mean?" I said, "It means bad things won't have any impact on
me." Meanwhile, I strengthened my righteous thoughts. They became quiet for
a while. Then they started to chat about family matters. I saw little black
clusters of spirits coming out of their bodies. I realized those were rotten
ghosts and low-level beings that controlled them. After the bad things were
destroyed, I started to clarify the truth to them. I told them that it was wrong
to denounce their belief in the Fa. I recited some paragraphs in Teacher's
articles of Fa Rectification Period Dafa Disciples and Path. When
they heard " ...Fa-rectification disciples who aren't able to come through
the Fa-rectification period will not have another chance to cultivate..."
(from Fa Rectification Period Dafa Disciples), some of them started to
realize that they made a huge mistake. Some of them even wept. I said, "You
went to Beijing to appeal for Falun Gong at the end of 1999 and the beginning of
2000, which was a great deed. It showed that you stepped out of human
attachments. However, the past magnificence won't make up for the wrong things
that you are doing now. Under pressure, you went back from the realm of God to
the level of human again. You need to correct your mistake. Otherwise, you are
not qualified to call yourselves Dafa disciples. You can only say you used to be
Dafa disciples. You need to publish a solemn statement to start over. You need
to stand up and continue with the path that Teacher arranged for you."
After several bouts of discussions that day, I found the reason that they
went on a wrong way was because they had too many attachments. They couldn't let
go of their pursuit of fame, physical interests, and sentimentality. Besides,
they didn't understand the Fa from the Fa. They didn't firmly believe in
Teacher. When there were conflicts, they didn't look inside. Instead, they tried
to handle them using everyday people's means. Under pressure, they started to
pursue comfort. Some of them had the attachment of fear. They were afraid they
would be beaten up or shocked by electric batons. Therefore, they unwillingly
left the cultivation way. I recited Teacher's poem The Knowing Heart. I
said, "Aren't you just like what Teacher described in the poem? --With a
preoccupied human heart, crossing the ocean proves arduous and with attachments
too strong, bearings are lost."
On the third day, Yi said to me, "I'll bring some other people. You know
some of them." I smiled. I recited the verse Teacher gave us to eliminate
the evil elements. I felt I was totally melted into the Fa and therefore I had
the power to melt any unrighteous elements. In the next hour, I didn't leave
them any chance to curse the Fa. When they first came in, they looked arrogant.
But later, they all started to praise the greatness of Teacher and the
perseverance of the Dafa disciples. I know they were their true selves at that
moment. I felt so sorry for them that they had exchanged their conscience for
temporary comforts. Though Teacher still gives them the hope and opportunity to
correct themselves, they did pay a huge cost. Besides, they had a history when
they tried to undermine the Fa, which is a shame.
When they left, I didn't feel over joyous. I know my righteous thoughts
suffocated the evil. However, I came to realize my selfishness that I only tried
not to be "reformed." I didn't take it as a good opportunity to help
them rectify themselves.
That afternoon, Chen, who was just "Reformed" told me, "Your
imprisonment term will be reduced if you agree to the reformation. Otherwise,
you will be tortured." I smiled. I remembered what Teacher said at the Fa
lecture in Chicago in 1999 that "By having your heart unaffected you will
be able to handle all situations." My heart was calm because of my firm
belief in Teacher. It wasn't till then that I came to realize the true meaning
of "the knowing heart." That is, for a person who obtained the Fa, his
heart will for sure know everything. Teacher said in Dafa is Indestructible,
"As a Dafa disciple, your steadfast, righteous thoughts are absolutely
unshakable..." Teacher's Fa is in my heart. Nothing can shake my
determination. The two days of "education" stopped. With the guidance
of Teacher, nobody tried to "reform" me again during my whole year's
detention at the forced labor camp.
The power of righteous thoughts
On the third day, Yi said, "From now on, you are exempt from the
education since the head of the squad was afraid that those who talked to me
might be "Reformed" back by you. Now, follow me." She led me to
an empty room. I sent forth righteous thoughts to make her sleep. Then I used
the time when she was sleeping to write down over ten new articles by Teacher. I
hid them well. However, whom should I pass them to? Who hasn't
"enlightened" along the evil way? When I had the thought trying to
find out whom I can talk to, Teacher made the arrangements.
After breakfast the next day, guards started to call people out to the aisle.
They commanded those who hadn't been reformed to gather together and do some
work, which had never happened before since they didn't allow determined
practitioners to get together before. I was called out too. When I went out, I
saw over fifty fellow practitioners. I was so happy. There were about one
hundred and twenty people in Squad Two. Except for criminals, I realized that
half of the practitioners hadn't been reformed, which was different from what I
was told before that most of the practitioners had been reformed. I was very
glad that there were still so many true practitioners.
I said to them in my heart, "My fellow practitioners, Teacher sent me
here to bring Teacher's new articles to you." I looked at them with a
smile. They also nodded to me happily. Though we weren't allowed to talk to each
other, our hearts could communicate easily. A fellow practitioner found a chance
and spoke to me in a lowered voice, "Careful, there are spies among
us." I had only one thought, "I'm a disciple of Li Hongzhi. Teacher
will make the best arrangements for me." Just when I was wondering who was
able to pass along the articles, Liu Lianying, the head of the squad, called a
person's name. I couldn't help smiling since I knew instantly that she was the
best candidate. I hadn't talked to her before. However, I had heard of her and I
knew she was a determined practitioner. Later, I started to pass the articles
one by one to her using the opportunities when we worked together. From that
day, we started to send forth righteous thoughts together when we got together
to work. From then on, I saw smiles on those practitioners' faces. The helpless
expressions on their faces before were gone. I knew it was the power of the Fa.
It can help bewildered people improve. It can also make weak people strong. The
bad environment in Squad Two started to change. Some "Reformed" people
came to realize their mistakes and rejoined us. It was a result of our sending
forth righteous thoughts together.
I told other practitioners that we should let the newly arrived practitioners
know that it was wrong to be "Reformed" and that they shouldn't listen
to the theories of those who had been "reformed." With our efforts,
none of the next over twenty practitioners who were sent to Squad Two got
"reformed." Liu Lianying was very mad. She cursed those who were
responsible for reforming practitioners. The forced labor camp also issued
notice that reformed practitioners' imprisonment term could be shortened to
half. Some of the practitioners couldn't resist the temptation. However, most of
us were still very determined. We kept sending forth righteous thoughts.
In order to force practitioners to "reform," Liu Lianying brutally
tortured practitioners. She beat up practitioner Xu from Gongzhuling City and
practitioner Liu from Jiutai County. They couldn't walk very well even one year
later. The guard Wei Dan shocked practitioner Mu Guiling with high-voltage
electric batons. Practitioner Mu lost her main consciousness for a long time.
She was "Reformed" when she wasn't herself. They would beat up
practitioners whenever it was their turn to monitor practitioners. Many
practitioners were badly bruised since Liu Lianying kicked them or shocked them.
They also instigated criminals to torture practitioners. They told those
criminals that they had to get involved in "reforming" practitioners
if they hoped to have their imprisonment terms shortened. Some criminals were
forced to beat up practitioners since if they didn't, the guards would beat them
up.
Liu Lianying moved me to Group Two since Wei Dan was the guard in there and
she was her best assistant. Wei Dan arranged Lin, a malicious drug addict, to
closely monitor me. However, within two days, Lin was deeply moved by the Fa's
magnificence and my righteous thoughts and acts. She never touched me. In fact,
she protected me from being beaten up by other criminals. Later, Wei Dan
arranged He X, another criminal with a bad reputation, to monitor me. One day,
she tried to kick me from behind when there were some officials around. Just
when she lifted her leg, I suddenly turned my head and looked at her into her
eyes. She got scared and asked, "Do you have eyes at the back of your
head?" I smiled, "Didn't I tell you that every sweat pore of
practitioners is an eye? Do you believe me now?" She said, "Yes, I do
now." Similar things happened three times. None of them managed to hurt me.
Later I clarified the truth to them. He X didn't get her imprisonment term
shortened since the guards knew she helped practitioners. When they were
released, they said they would start to practice Falun Gong.
Two hunger strikes to deny the persecution
The first hunger strike started on December 28, 2001. Almost twenty
practitioners joined in. The next day, only twelve practitioners continued. Some
of the practitioners dropped out because they were deceived by the guards'
hypocrisy. When they force-fed me, I kept righteous thoughts in my mind. They
force-fed me a bowl of salt water. I didn't feel sick even though they inserted
a pipe to my stomach via my nose and they pulled the pipe up and down. I asked
Teacher to strengthen me. Teacher said a person would be a god once he/she
obtained the Fa. How would they be able to hurt me?! It was very quiet when they
force-fed me. They were all shocked by my calmness. After the force-feeding, I
stood up and didn't feel sick at all. They all gave me the thumbs-up and said,
"You were great. We've never seen anybody like you before." I told
them that the reason we went on a hunger strike was to deny the persecution. The
force-feeding was actually another kind of torture. Therefore, they shouldn't
force feed us. A nurse said, "They did it to help you get well." I
said, "You should be able to tell whether they tried to help me or hurt me
when they brutally force-fed me." Later, the nurse was kind to me when she
was called to force-feed me."
When it was the eighth day into the hunger strike, there were only eight
practitioners left. When I saw them suffering a lot from the force-feeding, my
attachment to human sentimentality came up. They told me that they could hardly
bear it any longer. However, we didn't want to end the hunger strike without
achieving any results. After some discussion, we decided that I would be the
representative to talk to the officials in the forced labor camp. We asked for
four things, which were: improve the quality of meals, shorten the work-day,
forbid shocking practitioners with electric batons, and allow determined
practitioners to talk to each other. Camp authorities arranged a meeting. I
requested to have one determined practitioner from each group in the squad
attend the meeting. After a few hours' talk, the forced labor camp agreed to
what we asked for. We had better meals and shorter working hours. They didn't
use electric batons for a few days. Later I heard that the forced labor camp
originally planned to release me on the eighth day of the hunger strike. I came
to realize that I didn't totally deny the persecution by the old forces.
The second hunger strike was after the "Satellite TV Interception"
by practitioners from Changchun in March 2002. The Jiang regime launched a
large-scale arrest campaign. The Squad Two increased to two hundred and sixty
people. A new round of persecution started. Some of the practitioners who just
started to understand their mistakes went along the evil path again. They
actively got involved in persecuting newly arrested practitioners. They stuck
needles into the newly arrested practitioners. I heard cries all day long. When
I looked inside, I found my righteous thoughts were not strong enough because of
my selfishness that I was satisfied that nobody dared to torture me and nobody
watched me working hard or not. Therefore, I unintentionally walked down the
path arranged by the old forces. I was shocked when I realized this. In order to
deny the persecution, we decided to go on another hunger strike on April 18.
Almost thirty practitioners joined the hunger strike on April 18. The whole
forced labor camp was shocked. The officials from the forced labor camp said to
me, "If you can keep the hunger strike going for three days, we will agree
to your request of punishing Liu Lianying. We'll either transfer her to another
position or even fire her." The forced labor camp called in relatives of
practitioners to talk to those practitioners that thought they wouldn't be able
to stand the test of sentimentality. Two days later, about fifteen practitioners
dropped out of the hunger strike. There were twelve of us left in the morning of
the third day. Only nine remained by the afternoon of the third day. Till Day
Forty, only practitioner Zheng Donghui and I were still going on a hunger
strike. However, the hunger strike still shocked the evil so that they didn't
have much energy left to persecute practitioners. Their "reforming"
efforts also got weakened.
During the forty days' of hunger strike, I didn't feel sick. A physical
examination didn't show any abnormalities either. Dr. Chen was a kind man. He
got anxious and said to me, "Why didn't you send forth righteous thoughts
to fake some sickness. Then I can let you out." I told him, "How can I
get sick after cultivating so many years? I didn't go on the hunger strike to
get out. I simply want to show you Dafa is magnificent." All the people who
learned of my health condition after forty day's hunger strike couldn't help
admiring the Fa. Many of them said, "Falun Gong is magnificent. You didn't
get sick at all after the hunger strike. It looks like your cultivation is
successful." However, I felt I had some omissions and attachments.
After I was released, I started to study the Fa continuously for over ten
days to wash off my attachments. Teacher said in Teaching the Fa at the 2002
Fa Conference in Philadelphia, U.S.A., "...everything that happens
today in the ordinary society is the result of Dafa disciples' thoughts. Even
though the old forces do exist, if you don't have those thoughts they can't do
anything. When your righteous thoughts are strong enough the old forces can't do
a thing. ... You're cultivators, and all changes come from your cultivation and
the Fa-rectification; everything that you yourselves validate and enlighten to,
and everything that you'll receive, all this comes from what you have
done on your path. Absolutely don't think about any favors the old forces might
do for us, or about how the ordinary society might help us. You are the
ones saving 'society, and you are the ones saving sentient beings!"
I came to realize my shortcomings. Though I came out of the forced labor camp
with dignity, I stayed at the realm of trying not to get reformed and sending
forth righteous thoughts to suffocate the evil. I missed out many opportunities
to clarify the truth and save sentient beings. I had a big gap to catch up with
many other fellow practitioners from my local area. I had an even bigger gap to
reach the requirements of the Fa. However, I am a disciple of the Li Hongzhi.
I'm confident that I can do a good job with the three matters that Teacher asked
us to do as long as I study the Fa.
Teacher doesn't allow any possible stains on me
When my prison term was about to end, a guard asked me to fill in a
form. When I was about to sign the form, I hesitated for a second. Before, I
only wrote to clarify the truth and I always signed "a Falun Dafa
practitioner." I never signed "Imprisoned Person: XXX." Because
of my hesitation, the old forces tried to take advantage of me. The Guard Wei,
Guo, and Jia said simultaneously, "Don't seek trouble. Just sign
'Imprisoned Person: XXX'." Just when I wrote down the word
"Imprisoned," the pen didn't have any ink left. I immediately knew
what I should do. I smiled and said, "See? It wasn't me that didn't want to
sign like that. It was my Teacher who didn't allow me to sign like that."
Wei Dan came up to me and said, "Why, I just pumped some ink to it. How
could it not have any ink left?" She opened up the pen and swung it. But no
ink came out. I took the pen back. Suddenly a big drop of ink came out and fell
on the word that I just wrote. I laughed and said to them, "Isn't it a
miracle?" The guards couldn't say a word. Wei Dan gave me another form. I
filled it in and signed "A Falun Dafa practitioner," using just the
one pen that didn't seem to have any ink left.
After I came back to my cell, I told others what just happened. Everybody,
including those that had "enlightened" along an evil way and
criminals, wished me a good future and said, "It must have been your
Teacher. He didn't allow any possible stains on you." Yes, I can feel
Teacher beside me, protecting and guiding me through the voyage.
Finally, I want to say thank you to our Teacher. Teacher gave me the honor to
join the Fa-rectification process. I will keep studying the Fa, studying the Fa,
and studying the Fa more because my righteous thoughts, my firm belief and
everything of mine comes from the Fa. |