(Clearwisdom.net) I first heard of Xiaoqing's (an alias) story from a police officer. She was illegally arrested in 2001 for distributing Falun Gong truth-clarification materials. Five months later, she was illegally sentenced to a three-year prison term.

There have been many stories circulating about Xiaoqing in the places where she has been detained: the police station, the detention center, and the prison. People all know about a Falun Gong practitioner named Xiaoqing. It is said that the Public Security Bureau once issued an internal order: Whoever is able to "transform" (1) Xiaoqing will be promoted up one rank and he/she would get a triple-raise. Many people have tried. In the end, feeling helpless and pessimistic, a police officer said, "There is nothing I can do about her, unless I kill her."

Several years later, Xiaoqing herself sat before me. She had just recently been released from prison, and she calmly told me her story:

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I started practicing Falun Dafa because I was tormented by illnesses. I didn't know what being healthy was like until I turned thirty. Whenever I heard about a place that could treat illnesses, I would go check it out. I learned just about any kind of qigong. Yet, my health did not improve. Afterward, I began to practice Falun Gong, and pretty soon I became healthy. I've never had any recurrence of my illnesses since practicing Falun Gong. For the first time in my life, I knew what it was like to be free from illnesses. What was more important, though, was that my mind was purified. I understood many truths about life and I understood why people live and how I should walk my path in the future.

The miraculous effects of Falun Gong were spread by word of mouth and eventually reached hundreds of thousands of people. Back then, we practiced the exercises in a public square and many people came to learn. In the beginning there were only about a dozen people practicing together. In less than a year the number of people increased to more than 3,000. Later, we went to the countryside to spread the teachings. There were three elderly women in one village who were all hunched over with osteoporosis. All three were illiterate. So, we played recordings of Teacher's lectures. It is very difficult for elderly people from Southern China to understand Mandarin Chinese, yet they still persisted in coming over to watch the video. Every day we watched one lecture. When people asked them what they understood of Teacher's lectures, they replied, "Become good people and practice the exercises."

After watching the video for only three days, one elderly woman's back straightened. Nine days later we began teaching the exercises. Every day those elderly women did about twelve hours of farm work, yet, every night immediately after eating dinner, at around 7 or 8 p.m., they still came over to learn Falun Gong. Although they could not read and could not understand Mandarin Chinese, they didn't miss a day of practicing the exercises in the morning and studying the Falun Gong books at night. One month later, another elderly woman's back also straightened. Three months later, the last elderly woman's back straightened also.

We took the three women with us to different places to spread the teachings. Everywhere we went, they told people about the miracle of Falun Gong, using their personal experiences. Many people came to learn. In some villages, men and women, old and young all learned and practiced Falun Gong.

Back then we were so happy, seeing elderly, weak, sick, and disabled people start practicing Falun Gong and then pretty soon seeing their faces glow with health and their illnesses completely disappear. Every day, new practitioners joined us. Together we studied the teachings of Falun Gong, practiced the exercises and shared our experiences. Each of us held ourselves to a strict standard and tried our best to improve our character. That was indeed a pure land. Practitioners cared for each other and helped each other like a big family, because we have the same Teacher.

On July 20, 1999, a large-scale and widespread suppression of Falun Gong began. Back then, it was really as if the sky was about to collapse. All anyone wanted was to be able to study the Falun Gong principles, practice the exercises together, and be good people. Why suppress Falun Gong?

We went to the City Council to appeal, hoping to pass on our message to the authorities. Based on our own personal experiences, we wanted to tell people that Falun Gong is good and is one-hundred percent beneficial to society while posing no harm at all. However, we found that in this vast, boundless land, we didn't have a place to turn to speak up for Falun Gong.

If we made appeals, we would be arrested, and if we practiced the Falun Gong exercises in public, we would be detained. However, we still went. We could not bear their vicious attacks on Teacher. In our minds, our incomparably venerable Teacher's grace was something that we could never repay in our lifetime. How could we sit and watch those people slander and defame Teacher?

At that time, the situation was a little chaotic. Many fake Falun Gong scriptures were circulated by the authorities. Some people retreated from Falun Gong, yet a lot of people still persisted in practicing. By exchanging information with other practitioners, we learned about the situation in the various regions and we gradually understood what to do. We were all Dafa particles, and at this special moment each and every one of us was someone who was in charge, who used our own ways to validate the truth that Falun Dafa is good.

In 2000, we were finally able to access the Minghui website [Chinese version of the Clearwisdom website]. We could not describe how happy we were. It was as if we had a light guiding us through the dark night. We no longer felt helpless and confused. We bought a printer and started printing articles from Minghui. We wanted to let people around us know about the truth of Falun Gong. So, we printed large amount of truth-clarification flyers.

We printed hundreds of thousands of truth-clarification flyers. We distributed the flyers day and night. At each and every corner of the city, our Falun Gong flyers could be seen. At that time, we accomplished our work very smoothly, often playing hide-and-seek with police. These truly lawless personnel went back empty-handedly even after conducting many large raids across the city. A small retail shop was our truth-clarification materials base, and the police knew about it. They kept us under 24-hour surveillance. Yet, we still persisted in printing and distributing flyers. We were not afraid at all. They could not find anything to hold against us. This truth-clarification materials production site continued for several years.

Making truth-clarification materials and validating the Fa became an important part of my life. In 2001, I went back to my hometown to visit my parents, and I took with me several hundred copies of truth-clarification flyers. I had been away from home for about twelve years. Although I wasn't sure of the situation there and could not get in touch with local practitioners, I still began distributing truth-clarification materials.

One night, I went to a small neighboring residential area. After distributing flyers in several buildings and at each house without seeing anyone, I began thinking things were going too well. I again went to a market. After I finished distributing flyers in the market, I still had a dozen copies of the flyer left. I remembered that I missed a small unit in the area I had just visited. So I turned back and was ambushed and arrested by policemen who had been hiding and waiting.

At the police station, I kept reflecting on what happened. How could this happen? I had been doing so well. Why was I arrested on the first day I came home? I must have had a loophole somewhere: My righteous thoughts were not strong enough, and so I was taken advantage of by the evil.

When I was in another city I had not a shred of fear or concern. I was not afraid of getting arrested, beaten up or even dying--nothing whatsoever. Coming back home and seeing my aging parents missing and worrying about me day and night, I could not let go of sentimentality and I felt worried, with the following thought: Don't ever get arrested here because I don't want to implicate my parents.

Teacher said: "A good or bad outcome comes from a single thought." Because of that one thought I ended up being arrested. Now that I had gotten caught in this, I actually calmed down and did not think too much about the consequences. I made up my mind that I would learn from this lesson, remain steadfast and not give the evil any more opportunities to take advantage of.

In the detention center the authorities kept asking me three questions: "Who are you, where did you get your materials, and do you have any accomplices?" I said, "You better not ask me these questions and I won't answer them either. But if you want to know about the goodness of Falun Gong or why I distributed flyers, I'll explain."

When the court tried my case, they proposed to appoint me a defense lawyer, to which I refused. I told them, "If this lawyer spoke the truth and defended me based on his conscience, he would be attacked and suffer revenge by you. Wouldn't I be ruining him? If he dared not to speak the truth, or even collaborated with you, then what good would this defense be for me?"

I decided to defend myself in court. In the court, I told them the whole story of what I had been through. Based on my own personal experience I told everyone the following facts: Falun Gong is good; we have been unjustly persecuted; what the media said is all lies. In the end I said, "Today, on this podium, I finally have the opportunity to stand before government officials and the general public to speak justice for Falun Gong. Although I might be thrown in prison for doing so, I have no regrets or sorrow.

Three months later, a judge visited me in the detention center. He said, "Tomorrow the court will announce the ruling on your case. The key is your attitude." He asked me, "If we let you go, will you still practice Falun Gong?" I said, "Yes, I will still practice Falun Gong." He again asked, "If we don't sentence you, will you still distribute flyers?" I said, "Yes, I will still distribute flyers. As long as the persecution against Falun Gong continues, I will continue to distribute Falun Gong flyers."

The next day the court ruled that I had "disrupted public order" and sentenced me to three years in prison.

I was thrown in a women's prison. In the prison, the first thing I told the police was: "Don't you ever think about transforming me." They sent in two inmates to watch me. If I practiced the exercises, they would tie me up. After tying me up for two days, there was nothing more they could do, so they left me alone.

Playing it tough did not work, so the authorities tried to subtly manipulate me. The policemen kept trying to please me. They let "collaborators" serve me meals, wash dishes for me, and provide complete care for everything in my daily life. I held myself to a Falun Dafa practitioner's standard and explained the facts to them, asking them not to give me special care. However, whenever I practiced the Falun Gong exercises, they would kneel down, begging me to stop. I could not bear looking at their miserable faces. The police officers talked to me several times. They admitted that Falun Dafa was good; yet, they had to follow orders. They hoped that I would help them save face, and that as long as I did not practiced the exercises, they would go easy on everything else.

The prison inmates had to write a weekly "Thoughts Summary Report." In my report I always said, "Over this past week I persisted in practicing the Falun Gong exercises because I did not violate any laws. I'm unjustly detained here."

Every time I spoke up, other inmates would look at me with admiration. They all knew what I was going to say. I was the only person in this division who dared to speak with the voice of justice to the police.

One time the prison organized inmates to watch video programs that slandered and attacked Falun Gong. I grabbed the videotape and slammed it to the ground. I told everyone not to believe it, that it was all lies and deceptions. I told them Falun Gong was not like that at all and that the video program was made by people who lacked conscience.

My slamming of the videotape was really something major. Not only did a group of policemen rush in, but so did the supervisor. They pushed me to the ground and handcuffed my hands behind my back. One policeman said that they had never seen any inmate dare to resist like that and that it was simply an act of rebellion.

Several hours later a policewoman tried to unlock my handcuffs. Yet, the handcuffs were too tight, and no matter how hard she tried, she could not open them. She said, "Why? How much you have suffered!" I flipped my hands to the front and the handcuffs opened. The policewoman said, "What happened? Did you emit gong (2)?"

The next day they asked me if I admitted my wrongdoing, to which I answered no. So they fastened me to a window frame and only let me down to eat or sleep. The second day I still did not admit any wrongdoing. A police officer said, "If you don't admit your wrongdoing, we'll deduct your merit points." I said, "I started practicing Falun Gong because I was tormented by illnesses. I study the teachings of Falun Gong and practice the exercises in order to become fit and healthy and to become a good person. I did not do anything wrong. Suit yourself if you want to deduct my merit points." The police officer again said, "So you are not afraid of us deducting your merit points?! I'll write up a report encouraging the court to extend your term." I said, "I did not violate any laws. All I did was study the Falun Gong principles and practice the exercises in order to become fit and healthy and to become a good person. I distributed flyers simply because we do not have any other outlet to let people know the truth about Falun Gong. I did not disrupt public order. You are someone in the law enforcement field, please abide by the law."

From then on, the prison policemen showed special concern for me. Every morning inmates had to do morning exercises, but I was allowed to skip them. When I was not feeling well, I could rest in the room and did not have to work. They often asked me if I was homesick and if they should invite my parents to visit me, and so on.

When I was about to complete my prison term, the warden asked me to write a summary report, claiming that it was a routine that everyone released from the prison had to do. I did not write anything at all. She said, "You don't have to mention Falun Gong. Just write down how we have treated you for the past few years." I said, "I don't want to write it. Although you did not torture me, I have been unjustly detained here and lost my freedom for three years. I will not thank you because of that."

The warden asked me if I had thought about what I was going to do when I was released. I said, "I lost my job, so I'll just look for any job. But, I'll still practice Falun Gong and I'll still clarify the truth."

The day I was released, the city's Political Law Committee sent over a car to pick me up and told me that they would make arrangements for me for a job. I said, "It's fine to make arrangements for me to work. But you cannot make me write the so-called Guarantee Statement to guarantee that I will not practice Falun Gong. Secondly, you cannot restrict my freedom, nor can you have people following me." The city's Political Law Committee agreed to my terms and arranged for me to work in a hotel restaurant. I said that I could not accept the job because a cultivator should not kill. Later, they tried to put me in a wine company, and my answer was still no, because a cultivator should not drink alcohol, nor can he/she tolerate the smell of alcohol. In the end they arranged for me to work as a ticket seller in a park.

After being released from prison, I studied the Fa (3) assiduously. I read Teacher's new articles for three days and three nights in a row. It had been three years, and I had been completely isolated from the outside world and had not received any of teacher's articles. Now I was able to read Teacher's lectures, one after another. Tears welled up in my eyes. How compassionate and great our Teacher is; his mind is always filled with all his disciples. I will redouble my efforts in order not to let down Teacher's expectations.

After she finished telling me her story, Xiaoqing asked me if I had any questions. I said, "You were imprisoned for three years simply for distributing some flyers. Do you have any regrets?"

"No. Not for a second." she replied solemnly and firmly.

"Before [the persecution began on] July 20, 1999, I always thought that I had not cultivated diligently and had poor enlightenment quality. Therefore, I was very worried. When the persecution had just started, I also watched others and I did what others did. Afterward, I gradually understood that our cultivation path does not have any reference or example. I always believed one thing: As long as I steadfastly believe in Dafa and as long as I follow Teacher closely, this path will definitely be a bright and shinning one. I want to be worthy of Teacher and I want to prove that I'm a diligent disciple through my own actions."

I asked Xiaoqing again, "Do you hate those people who sentenced you to jail?"

"No. I don't hate anyone." Replied Xiaoqing. "I feel pity for them. I'm more blessed than they. Because I am the one that has understood the truth and the one with Teacher watching over me. Think about it. Although they have a pretty good job, freedom and special privileges, they live an exhausting life. Because of constantly pursuing fame, gain, affection or even very trivial matters, they cannot enjoy their food or sleep well. Every day they live amidst mistrust and treachery. Their future is bleak. Nobody has control over his or her destiny. When they lie down to sleep at night, they don't know if they will wake up tomorrow. How pitiful they are."

"People often ask me what is so good about Falun Gong. I always say, 'Falun Gong has given me a healthy body. What's more important is that it has given me a peaceful and happy life.'"

"Now, every day I clarify the truth to people. I explain the facts of Falun Gong and the persecution to everyone I come in contact with. Some people who do not understand Falun Gong would not listen to me. So I tell them, 'I have just recently been released from prison, I was sentenced to three years for practicing Falun Gong.' This statement always surprises many people. I then explain to them the truth about Falun Gong."

At that time, sitting before me with her eyes gazing far away, Xiaoqing looked calm and peaceful. It was hard to imagine that she had just been released from prison.

(1) "Transform" refers to forcing practitioners to give up Falun Gong.

(2) Gong is cultivation energy developed through practicing a righteous cultivation way.

(3) Fa: Law and principles; the teachings of Falun Dafa.