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Flattery Should Not Be Believed
By Qingyan
(Clearwisdom.net) In feudal China, after Yanzi had been dead for 17
years, Qijinggong was one day drinking wine with his senior officials.
Qijinggong shot an arrow with his bow, but the arrow did not hit the target.
Nevertheless, all of the senior officials praised him, with not one dissenting
voice in the chorus. Qijinggong sighed loudly and threw the arrow away. Xianzhang came in. Qijinggong said to him, "Xianzhang, since we lost
Yanzi 17 years ago, no one has pointed out my shortcomings and mistakes. My
arrow did not hit the target today, but every single one of my senior officials
praised me." Xianzhang answered, "Your senior officials do not have
the courage to admonish you. I have heard it said that, 'Ministers like to wear
what the king wears and eat what the king eats.' Do you like to hear flattering
words?" Qijinggong had to agree that he did. Just then, a fisherman delivered some
fish. Qijinggong wanted to send 50 carriages of fish with Xianzhang, but
Xianzhang refused. Listening to compliments and flattery can cloud people's vision, making them
unable to distinguish truth from falsehood. It is gratifying and can cause them
to be arrogant and believe that they are correct. It can cause people to be
unable to distinguish the kind from the wicked. Therefore, the wise monarch does
not believe the compliments of others. To glance at history, people who
subjugated nations and then lost their lives had no lack of flattering villains
around them. In daily life, many people like to flatter each other when they meet
relatives, friends and classmates, whether the compliments are genuine or not.
They are used to praise and flattery right from the beginning. Isn't that being
obsequious and fawning? People like to hear other's compliments and like to
receive flattery. They are so comfortable with others' praise that they forget
the ancients' teachings: "A good medicine tastes bitter and benefits the
condition," and "Good advice jars the ear and benefits behavior." Thus it can be seen that we should not take others' compliments seriously.
Otherwise we "take the arrow that did not hit the target and regard it as
an arrow that hit the target." This is deceiving ourselves as well as
others and eventually brings us harm. Perhaps when we refuse to accept flattery
or compliments, others will change their mindsets. Therefore, we should look
inside when we run into such contradictions.
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