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Towards Fundamental Improvement By a Falun Dafa Practitioner in Jilin Province
(Clearwisdom.net) When I was a child, I wondered, "Where did life come from?" and
"Where will I go when I die?" I thought about it over and over, but
such questions were difficult to answer. When I was older and able to read a
broad range of things, I tried to find answers from books. However, what I got
from those famous and wise people were only things like "life is like a
dream" and "I will continue to search for the answer." Those
books seemed to reflect a passive attitude about death, and the authors seemed
to have the same sense of loss as mine. Rather than helping me understand what
life was all about, the ideas made me afraid. I was afraid that I would still be
lost when I died. Until one day, that is, when I learned about Falun Dafa.
Astonishing changes then took place, and everything turned around. Once I began
practicing, my life became full of surprises. However, after truly entering the door of cultivation, all kinds of tests
came my way. These tests served to get rid of my sins and to improve my
character. Falling and standing up, I embarked on the path home like a child
learning to walk. Due to my not-so-diligent Fa study, my mother and I had gotten lost amidst
the widespread lies during the period immediately following July 20, 1999, when
the widespread persecution of Falun Gong began. This continued until the winter
of 2001, when we came into contact with fellow practitioners and were able to
read some of the newer articles, such as "Towards Consummation." Since
there were few copies of these articles available at that time, I could only
borrow a copy for a few days. I spent those days and nights copying the articles
by hand, so that I could gain a deeper understanding. By the summer of 2003, there were enough copies so that everyone could have
one. I thought, finally, I do not need to copy them. However, the following two
days, I had a feeling that was so bad that it could not have been worse. On the
third day, when I finished copying, the bad feeling disappeared. I understood
that Master allowed me to catch up by copying as I had wasted too much time
before. Now, copying has become a part of my cultivation, and I always find joy
in it. Because of this, when relatives shouted at me in public in fear of their
self interest being damaged, or when fellow practitioners became irritated at
me, I could face them calmly and with a smile. My thinking became wise and cool,
and I understood that the true forbearance of a practitioner is not to have any
anger, hatred, or feeling of being misunderstood at all. Minghui Weekly mentioned several times in 2003 about the importance of
reciting the Fa. I made up my mind to do it too. However, I felt it was too slow
and time consuming after reciting only a small part of it, and felt that I'd
rather read it straight through. However, when I was reading, I regretted not
reciting. After several rounds, I told myself that even if the Fa-rectification
were to end tomorrow, I should recite as much as possible today. Thereafter,
every time I recited, I always felt that I had really stepped into the door of
cultivation, as if waking from a dream. Because I was eager to get to know more practitioners and to improve myself
faster, Master arranged for me to find a learning center during the Spring
Festival of 2004. Suddenly in contact with so many practitioners, in the pure
practicing area, excitement and happiness made me forget who I was, which caused
complaints from my fellow practitioners. Hearing their sincere advice, I
adjusted my relationships with fellow practitioners and acted more properly. When Hong Yin (II) was published, some practitioners understood that
the words "bodies are imprisoned" referred to those practitioners in
labor camps. Later, some other practitioners understood those words as meaning
that the environment the mainland practitioners are in is like a prison. My personal understanding is, when we lag behind in cultivation due to our
own laziness, when our determination is attacked, and when we can't demonstrate
the character of practitioners, what is the difference between us and those in
the labor camps? They are forced, whereas we surrender to the evil willingly.
Our jail is intangible. The jail is not built up by others, but by our laziness,
sins, ideas formed after birth, and evil factors that have been waiting for
opportunities. When we hold firmly to ordinary comfort and happiness, and when
we tell fellow practitioners that the objective reasons are weak in-born quality
and enlightenment quality, who is going to be happy and who is going to be
upset? The old forces will be happy. The evil sees that and finds hope in our
lack of persistence and in our weakness. When we are angry toward other peoples'
weaknesses and lack of persistence, we forget completely that our own behavior
is not like that of a practitioner. We are supposed to completely negate the old
forces, and not even acknowledge their existence, but in our minds and
consciousness, we unknowingly leave room for degenerated notions to grow and for
incorrect behavior to remain. Master says in the Lecture on the Fa at the U.S. Midwest Conference, "As long as there is no one interfering with your practice, all
sentient beings in the heavens and on Earth can be saved." (provisional
translation subject to improvement). My understanding of this now is that all of the interference comes from
within oneself, and one sets himself up a "jail" with his own heart. Today, we have come to see clearly our weaknesses, shortcomings, and many
attachments. The improvement of my fellow practitioners around me and the beauty
of when they get rid of their lack of persistence encourage me to be diligent
myself. Even if I am the worst, I won't feel upset because of this. All the
disadvantages and defects will be erased. Because we are in the Fa, and because
we are being uplifted by Master, everything negative and bad will become good,
right and pure. In such a dirty and complicated world, we will be uplifted to an
unprecedented beautiful, new universe by Master. How can human language be
enough to describe and praise this wonderful future? To be worthy of the title "Fa-rectification disciple," to face up
to the great historical responsibilities granted by Master, I think we need to
do the three things well, and everything is included in the three things. We
should save as many sentient beings as possible before the arrival of the Fa-rectification
of the human world. I felt the seriousness and holiness of cultivation before, and now I feel the
happiness and joy of it. Time and again when I overcame my old self, it had been
an impossible feat. When the lack of persistence and notions were erased, I felt
the greatness of cultivation. Bathed in the compassion of Dafa, I feel like a
beam of the light - tiny - but having a true existence. Someone once said that cultivation is like a song, beautiful and moving. I
think it is more than that - it is a poem, beautiful like mountains and rivers;
like splendid music, allowing people to feel heaven in its harmony; like a
painting, making people feel the breathtaking colors in every detail; like a
delicate dance, making people feel indescribable joy in every action. I have too many feelings to describe one by one. During the process of Fa-rectification,
the little things that my fellow practitioners do help me understand what it
means to be truly great - the simplicity and ordinariness of their actions help
me everyday. (This is an experience sharing article for the first cultivation experience
sharing among Falun Dafa practitioners in Mainland China) Posting date: 2/21/2005
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