Learning Falun Dafa in Prison and Awakening from the Nightmare of My Past

By a prisoner still detained in a jail in Daqing City

(Clearwisdom.net) I am a prisoner who has been jailed twice. My perspectives on life and the world were quite deviated before I met Falun Gong practitioners. After I had contact with them, I came to realize the meaning and the purpose of my life, and how to fulfill them.

I came from a complicated family. My parents divorced when I was three years old. My sister and I were left with my father. He later remarried, and he and his new wife had another two children. Since childhood, I never knew my own mother's love or the love of a family. I often wandered around and didn’t want to go home due to family conflicts. I didn’t want to go to school, either. I loitered around and got to know many vagrants. I stole, fought, and did all sorts of bad deeds rather than go back to that heart-breaking home.

At that time I was looking for a young woman who could take good care of me and love me. I got to know a woman whose parents looked down on me because my family didn't have any money. In order to satisfy them and complete my dream of love, I used extreme methods to make money. In 1993 I robbed a bank with several scoundrel acquaintances. I was 19 that year and got sentenced to jail. My beloved girlfriend deserted me and my stepmother abandoned me as well. I found no warmth from my family and I completely lost my confidence in life. I perceived that all my troubles were the fault of women. I hated them. I wanted to retaliate towards women and society.

I was released in 1997 after serving my full sentence. Tempted by the debaucheries of the outside world, I decided that I should live for today and not care about tomorrow. I'd live carefree and enjoy myself only for today. Led by this notion, many wrongdoings led to self-destruction. In 2000, I was sentenced again for the crime of rape. I was detained in a prison in Daqing City. This time I went mad. I was desperate and began to think about taking my own life.

At this crucial point, I came to know the Falun Gong practitioners who were detained in the same prison. This was the turning point of my life. Falun Gong practitioners’ great deeds and their high moral values deeply touched me and changed my view of life and my attitude towards life. They helped me realize the meaning of life, why I live, and to know the principle of "Good deeds will be rewarded with good and evil will be met with retribution."

From then on I felt life was interesting and I could balance myself. In the past I thought that nobody would know it if I did something wrong, but now I know that there is a causal relationship. The reason I suffer is because I harmed others and did wrong deeds and I should be punished for it. The inmates fought among each other for personal interest and would punch people just to prove a point. Only Falun Gong practitioners treated everyone kindly. They uphold righteousness and the truth and are truly good people. What they are doing now is right; the whole world ought to admire them. Should trying to be good people provoke persecution? If so, then how should the world's people look at us criminals? Why is the crime rate so high nowadays? It's simply because there are so many bad people and they don’t know by what criteria they should measure themselves. They do whatever they want. Ordinary people live for money. Money is their goal. They believe in money and become slaves to money instead of the reverse. People no longer appreciate honest and kind people. If you speak the truth, people will say you are a fool and you are pretending. But if everybody were like Falun Gong practitioners, there would be no crime in the world. The moral standard of the entire society would then be improved.

When we came into contact with Falun Gong practitioners, all the criminal inmates were greatly encouraged. They are good people. Should all good people be persecuted?

After talking with practitioners, the criminal inmates said that I had changed. I didn’t argue with others over trivial things. I would often take care of and help other inmates. Before I easily went to extremes and was irrational. Now I am very content and encouraged. I am happier than ever before. I will be a good person and will be responsible to my family and to society. Those who live only for the moment don't realize what they will end up losing.

Falun Dafa is a righteous Fa. Falun Gong practitioners are genuinely good people. Falun Dafa allows me to know myself and lets me understand the reason why I got lost in the world. It gives me tremendous strength and a healthy body. It purifies my mind and soul. I now have the full confidence and determination to face my life and to be a good person once I am released from this prison.

Chinese version available at http://minghui.ca/mh/articles/2006/11/29/143503.html

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