(Clearwisdom.net) I began practicing Falun Gong in the summer of 1998. After July 20, 1999, I diligently carried out Teacher's Fa-rectification requirements, and steadfastly moved along the six year Fa-rectification cultivation path. Along the way, I have cried and felt joy. I cried when I toppled and did not do well! I cried when I saw people walking by my side damaging Dafa and refused to listen to my advice! I cried when fellow practitioners left Dafa and enlightened along an evil path!

At the time, when I let go of attachments and improved my xinxing, I was joyous! When everyday people understood the truth and were saved because of my truth clarification, I was joyous! When fellow practitioners improved, I would again be joyous! That joy comes from my innermost being and held tears, and the deepest sense of gratefulness towards Teacher and Dafa, which can never be expressed by words.

On my cultivation path and while validating the Fa, I have tripped because my attachments were used and worsened by the evil. I'm revisiting my cultivation path and validating Dafa.

In April 2005, I again stood up from another fall. I realized that because of wrongdoings I had committed, all kinds of little ghosts were often besides me. I also broke out in cold sweats frequently. When I again stood up, my graduate student course mentor (I was in my third year of graduate studies) let me use her office. Therefore, I again studied Teacher's lectures. When I studied the Fa, Teacher's Fashen often looked smilingly at me. Every time I saw Master's Fashen I burst into tears. I promised Teacher that I would certainly be diligent from then onwards. Every day I felt that I was rapidly improving, and said to myself that I must try hard to improve my xinxing, so I can do Fa-rectification things even better.

1. Validate the Fa on Campus During Graduate Studies

I knew that I had to think of ways to save the teachers and schoolmates I associated with. Although I was a bit scared when clarifying the truth, I realized that fear was an attachment I should abandon. This gave me the strength to eliminate fear. I was able to explain the truth to my teachers and fellow students. After I clarified the truth, I always felt at ease. They understood the truth, while I also let go of more and more of my fear. I printed truth-clarification materials for them at my out-of pocket expense at night when they were asleep, and did my experiments during the day. I never felt tired. Some read the information very carefully, and discussed with me that "gods may really exist." Someone said to me: "The Communist Party destroys belief, which is very harmful to society. People do not believe in gods, which in turn allows for social morality to become corrupted." When I noticed that they were throwing away materials after reading it, I said: "If you do not want to keep the material after reading it, just give it back to me." This helped me give the same material to many more people.

In the beginning, my mentor did not want to hear about Falun Dafa practitioners, and often was sarcastic. When I showed her the truth-clarification material, she tried to indoctrinate me. I waited until she calmed down, and patiently explained the truth to her at such time. I believe that an everyday person can be saved only because their nature still has a good side and that side can assimilate to Dafa. Thus, I addressed their good sides, allowing me to save them.

My mentor was a very stubborn person who was deeply immersed in materialism. But, she is a very upright person. Therefore, I let her see the positive side of Dafa and practitioner's righteous side. Every time I had a conflict with her, I looked within. When I found my attachment, I acknowledged my mistake and promised to do better in the future. However when I found that she was in the wrong, I would explain it to her patiently, which she willingly accepted. At the same time, I told her that I was able to rationally look at issues, because I was given this gift by Dafa. I talked to her many times like this, regardless if she was angry or fidgeting. I patiently waited for her to calm down and explained in depth little by little. I discovered that her attitude towards me also changed little by little. Moreover, she tried her best to protect me. Before I was about to graduate, she said to me: "You are not my best student academically, but you are the one I like the most." I knew that my mentor was saved.

During my study, I lived in a student dormitory. All those around me knew that I was a Falun Dafa practitioner. I also practiced exercises in public. I thought that Teacher arranged my being there, as my roommates were students from grade one to three. I constantly had new roommates. I continued to steadfastly practice the exercises in public, and tell them the truth.

The first time I clarified the truth was in 2003. Whenever I mentioned Dafa, I noticed that their minds were poisoned by the propaganda slandering Dafa. I said: "Let me talk about Dafa to you, and talk about Falun Dafa practitioners." I was nervous and my legs were shaking when I was telling the truth. But, because of my firm faith in Teacher and Dafa and the thought that I must save them, I did not hide, but made known that I practiced Dafa. Unexpectedly, after I announced this, my fellow students gathered around me and wanted to hear more. Seeing their sincerity, my heartbeat gradually slowed down. They said after a while, "We are fortunate that you are here, otherwise we would believe what is being said on TV!" Since then, I studied the Fa and practiced exercises openly in the dormitory and among my peers. Eventually, almost the entire institute (I am a masters degree student in a research institute of the Chinese Academy of Science) knew that I practiced Falun Dafa. I just wanted them to see what Falun Dafa practitioners look like, whether we are like the evildoers that kill and self-immolate as alleged on TV. All I wanted was for them to know the truth and see the lies for what they were. A senior student came to ask me when he wanted to know something. He said: "I only believe you, because I know your Falun Dafa practitioners are good people." Of course there were also some people who wanted to report me. The students who understood the truth helped me stop this. I was truly happy once I learned about this. These students did not just help me on the surface, but made the correct choice, and have a future life.

Once I left the truth-clarification material for Teacher A at the postgraduate course section. Teacher A immediately reported to my mentor, and my mentor told me off. She said: "I know you Falun Dafa practitioners want to be good people, but you need to consider also my feelings." I thought: "That's right, do not go to the extremes. I should consider everyday people's feelings." But, I realized from what my mentor said that she had understood the truth of Dafa. I thought, since the teacher of the postgraduate course section knew I practiced Dafa, I should take the opportunity to tell her the truth. I went to see her and told her that after I practiced Dafa, my female reproductive system illnesses were cured. She was very surprised, and talked to me about what she knew of Dafa. Another practitioner had talked to her earlier from too high a level, so I instead used arguments that everyday people could understand. I wanted to clear away her misunderstanding of Dafa. Since then, this teacher no longer created difficulties for me, instead she treated me very well. We continued to talk by phone until I graduated. At that time, I also told her to resign from the CCP and all its associated entities, and gave her informational material.

At the time of graduation, a doctor who just graduated and I invited several researchers for a meal. They mentioned about joining the CCP at the dinner table. I thought I had to take this chance to tell them the truth, although I felt uncertain in my heart. But, I thought: "Whatever stops me from discussing about quitting the CCP is an attachment I have not abandoned. I told myself that I must break through it." So I calmed down and said smilingly: "Teacher X, why do you still want to join the party? Others are withdrawing from the party!" The whole table was silent for several minutes. My mentor appeared to be very angry. I saw it in her face, and her tone became very stiff. I was flustered for a minute, but immediately thought "I am here to save you, you should treat me well!" Just after this thought, everyone again talked cheerfully and humorously, and she also treated me especially well. This was the first time I felt the power of righteous thoughts.

There was a new doctor, I also told him the truth. After he had listened, he said, "Thank you for telling me the truth." We had a temporary student. I also gave him truth-clarification material. I also gave truth clarification material to the expert whom we had invited. They all treated me well and we enjoyed ourselves in a harmonious atmosphere.

Once I was reading in the library when a young girl sat opposite to me. I felt her yuanshen (true spirit) really wanted to know the truth of Dafa, so I took material from my bag and gave it to her. She did not have time to look at me, and straightaway read the material. I thought how their hearts deeply longed to hear the truth!

Although I told the truth to the people on campus, I forgot to tell the truth to the cooks in the cafeteria. One day I realized that I had left my wallet in the cafeteria. I thought probably that was a hint from Teacher to give them truth-clarification materials. I returned to the cafeteria and gave them the truth-clarification material. Later I had the opportunity to give them the material about quitting the CCP and associated entities.

Just before my graduation, many people came to say goodbye. Someone held my hand and said: "I am at loss for words, but I just hope that you are careful in the future." Someone who had listened to my truth clarification sent me a short message, "You are a good person! Good people will be rewarded with goodness!" These kinds of things happened a lot. I discovered that after I explained the truth they treated me very well; and those who I had not been able to tell the truth to, some of them seemed to hate me. I realized our predestined relationship in this life is actually for them to obtain Dafa's truth! If I did not tell the truth when meeting them, wasn't their thousands years of waiting wasted? So, I held myself to even stricter standards. I must let go of all my selfishness, explain the truth of Dafa to every person with a predestined relationship with me, and bring them Dafa's truth.

2. Validating the Fa Off-Campus During Graduate Courses

I also clarified the truth off-campus. I often read articles on Minghui to see how other practitioners were doing, found my shortcoming, and took their good experiences as references. For example I had a bath at the bathhouse. I told the truth to the person who rubbed my back. At that time, she listened earnestly, and asked me, "Is this true?" She also told me something that puzzled her about the "self-immolation." I patiently explained the truth to her. After I had the bath, I handed out several Dafa truth-clarification materials to some people, and gave one to the boss of the bathhouse.

When I shopped, I gave truth clarification material to the shop owner. At the place where I had my breakfast every morning, I gave one to the boss. I also did the same when I went to a restaurant. Later the owners of restaurant all knew me, and looked at me with big eyes. But, I was not afraid, and did what I was supposed to do.

Of course there were also times when someone took advantage of me. Once I went to a bank to send money, and gave quitting the CCP material to the bank staff. The staff actually called me on the number I wrote on the remittance, and sternly asked me to come back. I felt awful for a flash, and instantly calmed down. I told him the truth on the phone, and said I would pick it up after work. Unexpectedly his tone relaxed, and said: "You do not need to come, I have already handed it over to my superior." I thought: "That's good, let the superiors also read it." On this material, I wrote that the provincial secretary of the province was sued outside of China for persecuting Falun Gong, and also many local fellow practitioners' names who were persecuted to death, and the name list of evildoers in court etc. I normally selected the local events to make truth-clarification material, and took into account the everyday people's feedback and their mentalities. I took information from Minghui and put them together. From that incident, I found I was not careful enough when doing things, since I had left my phone number. I should not give out materials at such time. I thought, "to be cautious does not equal to fear." The key is to not let the evil find a loophole and take advantage of it.

I also distributed the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party. I always had a few copies of the Nine Commentaries, which I had printed, in my bag when I left the house. I handed them out wherever I went. Once I distributed it in a restaurant. The waiter chased after me with the book in his hand and asked: "Is this your book?" I answered: "Not mine." I thought: "Of course it is not mine since I gave it to you." The waiter took the Nine Commentaries back, but still looked doubtful. Almost everywhere I have been to, I left truth-clarification materials. I often handed the material out smiling, because Teacher told us to have compassion for everyday people. Sometimes while I explained the truth to them, they repeatedly said: "Thank you for telling me the truth." I knew his clear side was thanking me. I found when I treated them to a smile, Dafa's power was even bigger. They saw my gentle and merciful side, and were pleased to see that.

It was important that I could think I had sufficiently clarified the truth in my school. Moreover our environment was rectified as well. At that time, my peers continued their studies towards the doctoral degree. But, I graduated for family reasons. From the moment I decided to leave, I felt that Teacher wanted me to return to my hometown to rectify the environment.

3. Being Forced to Divorce Gave me More Reasons to Tell the Truth Locally

After graduation, my husband wanted to divorce me, because I clarified the truth of Falun Dafa. The reputation of my ex-husband's family is very bad in the local area, and his entire family is against Dafa. My eldest sister-in-law is the chief of court, and participates in damaging Dafa locally. Just because I stayed at home, she watched herself a little more. My mother-in-law's temper is extremely bad. I constantly tried my best to be tolerant, and said nothing. I simply tried to behave as a Falun Dafa practitioner should. My mother-in-law is extremely good at talking. She even slandered Dafa when she went out. At home, she stomped with her feet and cursed Teacher and Dafa in front of me. I told her that she would suffer retribution. She did not believe me and said, "I'd only believe it if my legs or arms break at once." As a result, as soon as I left for school, she broke her leg. Since then she no longer goes out to talk and curse. Also, one of her relatives also suffered retribution every time she cursed. She broke her arm three times within several years.

All along, no matter how she treated me, I just did what I should and treated her well. She was moved after some time and said to me, "I have met all kinds of people (she fought with everyone), but I have never met anyone like you. When I curse you, you say nothing, and treat me well. I am convinced [about Dafa] by you." Once she said, "I know exactly what kind of daughter-in-law I have got." Since then she treated me better, although she still was foul-mouthed at times. But, that is simply her nature, which is difficult to change. But, she did not truly curse any more. I frequently showed pertinent truth-clarification materials, addressed to the court, to my eldest sister-in-law, as she works for the court, When she told me that her mother's temper was bad, I replied, "I am a Falun Dafa practitioner, Falun Dafa practitioners follow "Truthfulness, Compassion, Forbearance," I can be tolerant, and indeed treat mum well." She was shocked and said nothing. She also witnessed how I generally treated her mother. I insisted on living together with her mother. I thought: "She lost her father as a child, and lost her husband when she was middle aged. I live with her, so she can enjoy life now." I also often said this to my husband. I touched many people's hearts, including my second eldest sister-in-law, her husband and child. When I spoke the truth to my little nephew, and asked him, "Do you know that your aunt practices Dafa?" The child innocently answered: "I know." He said his teacher had told him how bad Dafa is, and played videos maligning Dafa. I was extremely distressed, and explained the truth to him with words that he could understand. My second eldest brother-in-law often said to me, "You must be careful, you are too kind." I was happy to hear that, because only people who understand the truth and support Falun Dafa practitioners would say such words.

In real life, every tribulation directly targeted my heart. It was very painful to pass the tribulation. Sometimes I might go out to cry when I really could not tolerate it, as I wanted to keep it from my family members. I knew it would harm them. I always recalled Teacher's words when I cried, "Dafa disciples, wipe away [your] tears" ("Clear-Headed" from HongYin II) (draft translation) I said to myself, "I should not cry! Enduring with tears is not the tolerance of a practitioner. I must endure calmly and not feel bitter at all."

Between 2001 and 2002, my husband wanted to divorce me because of my practice of Falun Gong. I became very skinny within one year. Because I am a Falun Dafa practitioner, I did not agree to a divorce. As long as we did not divorce, regardless how he treated me, I felt I should treat him kindly, because Teacher said, "Other people may do wrong, but we can't." ("Lecture on the Fa at the U.S. Midwest Conference") (draft translation) Despite the pain, I must uphold the principles of a Falun Dafa practitioner. However he consorted with a prostitute. After I learned about it, my feelings for him and human notions overwhelmed me. I felt extreme pain, and wanted to end my life. Later I thought, I am a Falun Dafa practitioner, how can I think like this? Furthermore, I also have many responsibilities. I treated him as usual. In the beginning, he abandoned me, but I tried my best to get rid of my grievance. Afterwards I suggested divorce, but he did not want a divorce. I practiced Falun Gong as usual. He was still unhappy when I practiced, but did not oppose it like before. He also saw that I recovered from severe illnesses after practicing Falun Gong. When I returned home after graduation this year, he again wanted to divorce me. The reason was that I clarified the truth. He said that as long as I promised to not to clarify the truth, he would not divorce me.

I simply said: "No, I must tell the truth." I said: "My illnesses were cured by Dafa. When Dafa and Teacher have difficulties, I, a disciple, must speak for Dafa. Of course, I understand your concern. I will do the best to assure the safety of myself and the family." I explained the truth to him from all angles. Later he found many people to help him change my mind. I regarded it as an opportunity to tell them the truth. Finally, the most persuasive talkers said to me, "Originally I was not in favor of Dafa. When I found that you practiced Dafa, I realized that you are a good person. Now, I know the truth." Those people were sent to me actually to listen to my truth clarification, and let me save them.

Afterwards his eldest sister intervened in our marriage and summoned me to the court. I told her, "A judge is to maintain justice. If the policy of Communist Party is wrong, you can think of ways not to execute them. The Nazi regime also felt they could act wildly against law and public opinion in their country, but eventually they were the ones who were prosecuted under the law. Moreover, I believe you know the truth of Dafa." It was a pity that she was not righteous. She said, "It is not for me to decide! I follow whoever pays me. I don't care about conscience, I only care about present benefits." I did not say anything, she understood the truth, but chose to do evil. Then it is useless to say more. Later, because of her, we were divorced.

After the divorce, I felt that I behaved as a Falun Dafa practitioner should. But, after some time, as my "xinxing" improved, I realized that I had often not behaved as a practitioner. For example, while I explained the truth to my ex-husband with what I believed irrefutable arguments, I forgot to send forth righteous thoughts. Probably my righteous thoughts could have eliminated the evil behind him. Then, he would have also understood. I often blamed myself because of this. Moreover, I found I should not have agreed to the divorce, as my reasoning was not that of a practitioner. I should have disagreed. My human notions governed me at that time, "It is the second time he wants to divorce me, then let's divorce. Moreover, he would stop me from telling the truth. This is also not beneficial. If I can't let him understand the truth in his home, how can I tell others from now on."

News of things like a divorce always spread quickly. I was thinking I couldn't let it cause a negative impact on Dafa and harm sentient beings. I could use it to tell the truth. I found a very diligent local practitioner: "If everyday people talk about my divorce, you just tell them, 'her illnesses all disappeared after practicing Falun Gong. She obtained lots of benefits from Dafa. You tell me, if she is unable to say just words for Teacher and Dafa, can she be a human being? Moreover, her ex-husband divorced her because of social pressure. We can't blame him, we must blame the Communist Party. At that time, you may expose all the scandals of the Communist Party. Talk about how it caused many families to be broken up. This way, not only will they hear the truth of Dafa, you can also mention about quitting the CCP. This thing will spread very rapidly, let everyday people willingly spread the truth, the outcome will be even better. I did not say my ex-husband was bad. I was giving his family one more chance. What we truly expose is the evil that damages Dafa. If you hear about this, you just tell them like this. If the rumors are not true, then we again correct them. I am not afraid of others knowing that I'm a Falun Dafa practitioner." Afterwards, the fellow practitioner told people just as I had said, and I told the same to my parents after returning home.

My mother had never gone out to clarify the truth. Because of this incident, she also told the truth although she does not practice Falun Gong. She knows Dafa is good. Sometimes she practices exercises, but does not read the book. I tell her my understanding of Dafa at my level , and she improves along with it. My father has been clarifying the truth since around April or May in 2005. He was the only practitioner in the entire village. I am extremely anxious to save people in my village. Now, because of my divorce, the entire village heard about my divorce and the truth. My father used my divorce to tell the truth to the villagers.

(To be continued)