(Clearwisdom.net) During the past year, I read through Master's lectures from 2006 and 2007. I developed further understandings and gained new experiences about cultivating in a way that complies with the state of ordinary human society.
Through learning the Fa, I came to understand that all I have seen and come into contact with have come for the Fa. The illusive ordinary human society provides an environment that allows a life to truly cultivate. It is a great environment that Master wants and a great environment that relates to the Fa-rectification of the whole universe and the harmonization of the future universe system. Therefore, we must maintain this environment well during our cultivation. In other words, we should cultivate in a way that is in accordance with everyday people as much as possible.
If I had learned the Fa well, it should not have been a problem for me to cultivate in a manner that complied with the state of ordinary human society. However, because I tended to go extremes and tended to comprehend the Fa with selfish purposes and attachments, when I thought of cultivation, I thought that I had to separate myself from ordinary human society. When I thought of giving things up, I thought that I must give up all ordinary things (such as money, job, and family). When I thought of discarding attachments, I thought that I must not be interested in anything, and I felt that everything in life should be muddled through.
After I became destitute and homeless, I gradually came to understand that I was wrong. Giving up everything did not help me to elevate my mind nature (xinxing) and discard my attachments. Instead, it created trouble for my cultivation; it gave people a negative impression and caused difficulties in my saving lives. Quite simply, I did not listen to Master's words, and the way I had cultivated was not what Master wants.
After I came to understand this point, I began to treasure more this ordinary human society instead of "disliking" it as I had before. Master asked us to consider others first when we do things. I therefore started to try my best to do well in my work. I had no any complaint when I was asked to do overtime or to be on duty. I also paid attention to the details of everyday life. For instance, I noticed there was no one taking care of the public sanitation in the dormitory at the work site. So I did the cleaning work quietly. I also noticed there was no one taking care of the public bathroom and there was no water in the bathroom, so I then paid attention to turning on the pump to fill up the water so that people could take a bath. I also cleaned my dormitory room every day and did my best to maintain my personal hygiene. Although it was dirty and messy at the work sites, I cleaned my shoes before I went to the work site so that others' impression of me would be of someone who was neat. I am assigned to clean the bowls and dishes while others cooked. I washed the bowls and dishes clean and then used boiling water to sterilize them, because I considered the issue of infectious diseases that ordinary people are susceptible to. They were all very pleased that I paid attention to sanitary issues.
My job was supervising projects. I maintained a calm demeanor at work and did not complain or get angry, and I purposely did not use the authority I had to cause trouble for others. The work site was far away, and it was difficult to cook food for work, so I ate at the cafeteria of the engineering unit at the work site. Before I left, I wanted to pay them for the meals I had eaten there. However, the head of the engineering unit did not want me to pay, so I bought food for the equivalent value and gave it to the cafeteria. The workers all respected what I did. I overheard their comments, "What a high moral standard he follows. This is a manifestation of a truly high morality."
One of my roommates believed the Chinese Communist Party's (CCP) fabricated propaganda against Falun Gong, and he had a deep misunderstanding about Dafa. Sometimes when he was drunk, he even threatened that he wanted to report me to the police because he knew that I was giving copies of the "Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party" and Disintegrate the Party Culture to workers to read. He was angry and scared and said that he did not want to be my roommate. I knew that Master was protecting me, but what I had done was still not pure enough. I kept Master's words in my mind and treated others kindly, and I did not haggle over any personal gains or losses. As a matter of fact, on the first night when he moved in, he was very drunk. He got up in the middle of night and urinated at the head of my bed. Not being completely awake, I thought about what could be the problem, and then I soon calmed my mind. I turned my head around and fell to sleep again. In the morning I let him see the wet floor; he finally admitted that it was his doing. I also cultivated my speech on this issue; I did not tell anybody because I knew that this was related to my cultivation. I did not need to complain about it to everybody else.
One day he told me that he had been observing me for two months. He said he had thought that Falun Gong practitioners did not acknowledge their family and friends. However, from his observations, I was not that way; I was warmhearted toward others.
At the beginning, I did some things with a mentality of validating myself. Through my continuously learning the Fa, I gradually removed the mentality of self-validation and developed an understanding that every one of my words and deeds represents the image of a Dafa practitioner and that I must do well. Thereafter, although I was doing the same things, my mentality changed. I started to truly consider others and to care for others from my heart. My relations with the people around me got more and more harmonious. This, of course, was helpful for me in clarifying the truth and offering people salvation.
However, because of my fear and other attachments, even though I knew that Master had arranged a certain predestined person to come to me, I sometimes was not able to persuade him to withdraw from the CCP and its affiliated organizations or to explain the facts of the persecution of Falun Gong to him. I lost many opportunities to save lives. I did not do well in this respect. I will study the Fa more, read more Minghui/Clearwisdom articles, and take the time to catch up with the Fa-rectification. My understanding is that I must walk out of being an ordinary person so that I can then truly save people.
