(Clearwisdom.net) Respectful Master, greetings! Fellow practitioners, greetings!
I obtained the Fa through the Internet in March 2005. Right now, I would like to share with all of you my cultivation experiences before and after the municipal election. If there is anything improper, please be kind enough to point it out for me.
I. Clarifying the Truth of Dafa during the Municipal Election
Before the Toronto municipal election in 2006, a city councilor publicly made some discriminatory remarks about the Divine Land Marching Band. Making use of this event, I then carried out truth clarification during the election.
One Saturday last October, there were to be meetings with candidates for city councilors, so I decided to deliver truth clarifying materials. When I took out my printer to have some materials printed, I found it was running out of ink. I immediately knew it was interference preventing me from going. Nothing could stop me; I had to go! The meeting started, and during the question period, I picked up a number to get in line to ask a question. I would never have expected that I could have the courage stand up and raise questions in front of so many people. I used to be quite reserved, and never wanted to speak in public. It's kind of agonizing for me; I would feel awkward and rather uneasy, especially with mostly English speakers in the audience. Since my English is very poor, I worried that I wouldn't complete a whole sentence or I would simply forget what to say due to nervousness. But I also told myself, with such a crowd here, I surely won't be asked my number to raise any questions. And so I sat there calmly as if nothing was happening. I was absolutely unprepared. I heard the host read a number aloud, but no one stood up nor even answered. I looked at the number in my hand. I just about fainted! Why was it me? I had to stand up straight, my heart almost popping out of my chest. I felt my cheeks burning, they must have turned red. I stuttered out words with a trembling voice, saying all that I could remember. There were pauses as I stopped to think about the next sentence. The host urged me on twice, asking me to briefly make the questions clear. That made me even more nervous. After I took great trouble to put forth my questions, including the question of what they thought about the city councilor's discrimination towards the Divine Land Marching Band, the candidates answered me one by one. But I could only roughly get their ideas, and I missed most of the details. There was one candidate who asked me something and repeated it twice: unfortunately, I did not understand it at all.
Truth be told, before the end of the meeting, I strongly felt Master and all the divine beings watching us. It was 11 p.m., but my heart was still beating like a drum. I was feverish from head to toe. This was really abnormal, and lasted too long. I had to think it over. I found that although I was scared, and suffered a kind of stage fright, this was only the appearance in this dimension. In reality, I concluded that I felt frightened by all the divine beings staring at me. It showed that I'd done a lot of unrighteous things before, so I felt sort of guilty and ashamed. I also did not fully believe in Master and the Fa, and had not done the three things well. At last, I enlightened that it was Master who wanted me to do this thing well.
On Monday I was kind of occupied, but I felt somewhat relieved, thinking I would be busy the next day so I could not attend the next candidates' meeting. I also found some "reasonable" excuses like: "The thing I'm busy with is also related to the Fa. Everything should be done, right? It does not matter what I do. Plus, I am not a Canadian citizen." But on Tuesday night, when I sat down and thought it over, I found those ideas ridiculous. I had selfishly found many excuses for shrinking back from difficulties. Master says in Zhuan Falun:
"Without human action happening under cosmic changes, such conditions would not have been brought to ordinary human society, and neither would they be called cosmic changes." ("Lecture Seven")
I often heard fellow practitioners talking about people missing chances and missing the cosmic arrangements. I then decided I must go on Wednesday. Saying in public that I am a Falun Gong practitioner might solve all the problems, for everything is arranged by Master.
On Wednesday two other practitioners attended the meeting. On seeing one of them, I felt so happy and relieved, thinking that with him there, I would not suffer having to stand in public. We sat in the second row. At the beginning of the question period, three other people had asked their questions, but all three of us had remained seated, and the meeting would end after three more questions. Suddenly it came to me: "Go! Go!" I finally raised my hand. I stood up and asked the same question as the previous evening. Though I could still feel my voice trembling, I held control of it. A young lady candidate said that she had once seen our marching band and found it gorgeous, very peaceful and wonderful, and had taken lots of photos. She said, "You should not be discriminated against." After that, my fellow practitioner also stood up and asked, "What about government officials accepting offers of free travel and free gifts provided by the CCP, and keeping silent or turning on Falun Gong under the pressure of the Chinese Embassy? He also asked why the motion for Falun Dafa Day was not yet approved. The councilor explained at once that he had never taken any offers from nor accepted any pressure from the CCP.
I was late for the third meeting. Three people had already put forth their questions, while my fellow practitioner in the front row sat quietly. I put up my hand. Just when the last candidate finished answering the audience's question, I rose and stepped forward, and with a loud voice I put forth my question and asked all the candidates to answer it. My voice still was not as steady and firm as it ought to be, yet I had made progress. I had practiced repeating my question out loud to myself after the second meeting, so little by little I could speak clearly and loudly enough to ask my question.
At the fourth meeting, there were 13 candidates and over 200 people in the audience. Once the meeting started, someone in the audience argued with one of the candidates, which I knew very well was interference. I then started to send forth righteous thoughts to eliminate the wicked demons and rotten ghosts behind them. People could raise questions only when their number is drawn. I sat there sending forth righteous thoughts. I was a bit anxious as three people had asked questions. Why was it not my turn yet? All of a sudden I realized I shouldn't have taken a fellow practitioner's ticket (which had his number on it). Wasn't I taking my fellow practitioner's chance to cultivate? What a bad mentality of showing off and selfishness! I confessed to Master that I had realized my mistake. My heart immediately turned peaceful. I kept on sending forth righteous thoughts. As a result, my own number was called and I became the fifth person to ask a question. So I stood before the microphone and I was asked to finish my question in 30 seconds. I then loudly, peacefully and calmly asked my question. All the candidates stood up one by one and gave answers to my question. After the meeting, fellow practitioners further clarified the truth and separately gave truth-clarification materials to the candidates.
With the experiences of attending those meetings, I realized that I'd better wear something neater. So from the fifth meeting on, I started to wear a suit and tie. Furthermore I intentionally wore a small eye-catching Falun emblem. Entering the meeting hall, I found that for unknown reasons, people glanced at me more frequently. Nobody had paid any attention to me before. I raised my question and found among the candidates a councilor currently holding the post. He was a friend of the councilor who had made negative remarks about Dafa. The councilor was spreading rumors that we could not take part in the parade for we had not been invited. On hearing this, I stood up and loudly exclaimed, "You are wrong. We received an invitation, and I have proof of it."
In the evening, I attended the Toronto mayoral candidates meeting. I got there early to take a seat near the microphone. My fellow practitioner, a westerner, had the chance to be the first to ask questions. There was a candidate who said, "I am a Falun Gong practitioner, I know about Falun Gong. Since there were over 100 million people practicing Falun Gong, the number of cultivators was more than the CCP membership, so it launched the persecution. If I were elected, I would adopt the act of International Falun Dafa Day in Toronto."
During group study at Toronto University that weekend, fellow practitioners asked me to share my cultivation experience during the municipal elections. Thus, my attachment of showing off welled up. On the second day things had changed greatly. One evening I went to attend a meeting, but I was not allowed to raise any questions because they found out that I did not live in the area. I realized my heart was moved by the ordinary people present, and I had forgotten my mission here. If I missed the chance to raise questions, there would be losses! I thought about leaving, yet on second thought, I considered it improper. I had to make up for the things that I had done poorly! I would wait until the last minute to clarify the truth to them. While I was sending forth righteous thoughts, I again confessed to Master that I had identified my attachments and asked Master to help us to put forth questions. When it was only 6 minutes before the meeting's end, time seemed frozen. It was our turn when there were only 5 minutes left. Within the limited 5 minutes my fellow practitioner read through our questions and two candidates finished their answers. In all of the 10-odd meetings I attended, there had never been 8 people who raised questions and received responses within such a short time, I knew it was Master who helped us one more time.
At the last meeting, when I handed out materials to the last candidates, I realized the campaign was over, and this cosmic opportunity had passed. But I did not feel relaxed; instead I felt a heavy burden. I knew I had not done well in many aspects, and more than that I saw many candidates - especially those in positions hidden away from us - for whom I did not know what kind of future they would have.
On the second day, when I practiced the exercises, I felt heat inside and out which I never felt before. I knew it was Master doing guanding (a form of purification) to me. Through truth clarifying during the municipal election, I felt strongly that Master was at our side at all times to help and to enlighten us. I made progress, with both body and mind relaxed and my capacity enlarged.
II. Enlightenment from My Leg Pain
After the municipal election, there were 11 Christmas parades over the following three weekends. Once, within a single day we drove hundreds of miles to take part in three different Christmas parades. There were several hundred thousand people on site and millions of TV viewers who saw "Falun Dafa." The second day after the parades, I sat on a mat rubbing my legs to get ready for meditation. I had arthritis in my left leg before, and when it was windy in winter, it used to hurt. That had disappeared after I obtained the Fa. But two months ago, it came back again. I even felt pain when I was going up and down stairs. I knew that karma is eliminated from the microscopic level, layer by layer, and this was the reflection of it. I insisted on doing the sitting meditation, and with great effort, I can still make it for an hour, yet I have to spend about 15 minutes to press down and rub my leg.
Though I know I am supposed to enlighten from it, I haven't understood yet. Once when I was rubbing my painful leg, two Chinese characters flashed into my brain, which were "cultivation practice," namely cultivating xinxing together with practicing gong - at the same time this means "cultivation." These two words represented my two legs, the left one is cultivating, the right one is practicing. I thought I might have problems cultivating xinxing. The fact is, I have always considered practicing the 5 exercises my first priority, and put studying the Fa as secondary. I practiced exercises every day, and if I ran out of time I would skip studying the Fa. If there are only two hours left in a day, I would normally use it to practice. I realized that this is where the problem lies. In the evening, when I studied Zhuan Falun, a paragraph suddenly came to my eyes and touched me,
"What we lose is actually something bad. What is it? It is karma, and it goes hand in hand with different human attachments. For example, everyday people have all kinds of bad thoughts. For self-interest, they commit various wrong deeds and will acquire this black substance, karma. This directly involves our own minds. In order to eliminate this negative thing, you must first change your mind." ("Lecture Four")
I read it several times, and I suddenly enlightened: I only know that while practicing the exercises, karma can be transformed; while in conflicts, when upgrading xinxing, karma will be shifted; but actually during studying the Fa, the sudden display of Fa principles is also the process of enhancing xinxing. Master eliminates the karma according to improvements in xinxing.
Afterwards, I strengthened my Fa study, and I tried to balance time for studying the Fa and practicing the exercises. Within less than a week, my leg pain was considerably reduced.
These are my experiences and understandings during cultivation practice. Please point out anything that fails to meet the standard of a Dafa cultivator.
