Finding the Reason for Not Studying the Fa Well

(Clearwisdom.net) It is not easy to uncover a fundamental attachment, because the attachment is covered by human notions. It took me about three years to find my fundamental attachment. Recently, a practitioner shared with me that in the beginning, he hoped to have his father's illnesses healed. Later, he realized Falun Gong was good, hence, he started to practice. Is the word "good" pure? We originally belong to the old cosmos. Being in the midst of delusion and with notions formed in the Chinese Communist Party (CCP)'s culture, we have few good characters left. Reading was my only passion, because reading helped me go through many frustrations in my life, and at the same time, my knowledge was developed. I came to know Falun Gong when I was depressed. At that time, I considered Zhuan Falun the best book in the world, because I could obtain the "Right Fruit" and be rescued from the abyss of misery.

I want to talk about the word "good." I consider something as being good when it conforms to my own ideas. Teacher has asked us to study the Fa more and I did read a lot. There is nothing difficult for me. Recently, some practitioners' attachments have been triggered by a novel. While sharing about this, a practitioner mentioned that even though he wasn't swayed, he was very interested in the articles that talk about the scenes in other dimensions and reincarnation. I found that I was also very enthusiastic about these kinds of articles. I remember to go to the Clearwisdom website and Pure Insight website every day and expect one the next day. I would read Zhuan Falun only after viewing the web pages.

Yesterday, I missed reading the articles from the websites. I felt very bad about it. This morning I searched inside and found that I read the Fa as I read ordinary books. I walked into Dafa to find a mental resting place. I studied the Fa with the pursuit of curiosity and thoughts about my own salvation. My attachment of selfishness was exposed. It was so shameful and formidable to have the attachment of taking advantage of Dafa. As Teacher said in On the Novel The Cosmos' Calamity: "...you shouldn't let your heart and mind bob about like duckweed, stirred at the first hint of wind." I was not truly rooted in the Fa in mind and body.

It's up to us to seek what we want. This is the universe's law. As long as I look inside, the Fa will give me a hint to show my attachment. The only thing left is to get rid of it.

I believe that after eliminating this fundamental attachment, I will study the Fa more and study it well. We must be responsible in saving sentient beings.

Chinese version available at http://www.minghui.org/mh/articles/2007/6/24/157409.html

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