Western Practitioner: Emerging from Tribulation and Learning from Dafa Websites

(Clearwisdom.net) When I was asked if I would write a paper for this conference, I replied, "No. I am too extroverted. I will just listen to others' papers." The next morning I realized that I had the wrong attitude. I just needed to focus on what attachments I had that made me too extroverted and work on letting go of them. If everyone had a reason for not writing a paper, then there wouldn't be any papers.

Then, I thought that I had nothing to write about. I have recently passed through some very difficult tribulations. In some ways I did well, and in some ways I did not, but the underlying issues were not directly related to working on the website. However, it occurred to me that items I had read on the website had helped me through the tribulations. So, I decided to write a short paper on how reading Teacher's new articles had helped me through one of the tribulations. I think papers on how we ourselves benefit from reading Clearwisdom can help us remember the good the website does for practitioners around the world.

Almost a week later, while validating cultivating within suburban life (I was replanting the grass around my driveway) it occurred to me that even if my paper is not read, writing it will deepen my understanding. This is a basic principle that I had forgotten about. Perhaps it was a heavenly hint that this occurred to me right after I had cleared the soil and was ready to plant new seeds.

In Lecture 6, "Your Mind Must Be Right" of Zhuan Falun, Teacher stated,

"At a certain point in time, you will be made unable to discern clearly whether something is true, whether your gong exists, whether you can practice cultivation and make it, or whether there are Buddhas and if they are real. In the future, these situations will surface again to give you this false impression and make you feel as though they do not exist and are all false--it is to see whether you are determined. You say that you must be firm and sure-footed. With this determination, if you can indeed be firmly resolute at that point, you will naturally do well because your xinxing will have already improved."

On the last Sunday in June, I suddenly and unexpectedly found myself in the midst of a tribulation. To explain how this happened, I need to describe a conversation I had in 2003 while helping with a torture reenactment in midtown Manhattan. A religious person started walking behind the practitioners who were sending forth righteous thoughts and angrily blurting out Bible quotes.

With as much compassion as I could, I talked with him. Basically, he thought we were doomed to hell, and he was trying to save us. This reminded me how cruel and unfair the old force arrangements are. Many religious believers are trying to do their best to live good, moral lives. However, they have been poisoned with erroneous beliefs from within their religions that now endanger their futures. I felt an urgency to help this person. I did know enough about the Jewish and Christian Bibles to have an intelligent conversation with him about his own beliefs. In short, the conversation ended well. I was able to get him to focus on Christ's two primary teachings, "love thy neighbor as thyself, " and "judge not, or you shall be judged." Basically, I helped him to understand that he was not following his own religion if he was angry at us or judging us. He understood that I was genuinely concerned about him and agreed not to have bad thoughts about this. Although the results were good, my thinking was flawed.

I am now one of two people who coordinates our local practice site in my home city. I volunteered to do this not too long ago because our group had almost abandoned the site. It is near many of the most famous tourist attractions in the city, and busloads of Chinese tourists from the Mainland walk by it. In addition, many people from all over the world, including people who do not live near practitioners, also pass by. I mention this because as practitioners become more involved in a wider variety of projects, foundational projects like practice sites sometimes get left behind.

The last Sunday in June, a large man walked up to me and said, "Did you know that the one true savior is Jesus Christ." He then began to tell me that I was doomed. I asked him why he thought so, and he said that he had seen a documentary about Dafa on television. My heart started pounding; I was frustrated and a little angry about how much damage television could do. Also, he was saying a lot of terrible things about Dafa. As a Westerner, I don't often hear this in person. Even if a person is thinking this, they seldom will say anything like that. I tried the same approach I used with the religious person I met in Manhattan. I was completely ineffective, and I descended into an argumentative state with the man.

Later, I was very disappointed I had done so poorly. When contemplating the situation, I was still using the same faulty logic, and my state got worse. Then, suddenly the tribulation Teacher warned about in Zhuan Falun was present. My mind was filled with a lot of doubts about how real Dafa was. I've often had doubts about my ability to cultivate, but not about Teacher. My state was awful for a few hours. It was a very intense experience. Then, I remembered Teacher's article, "Disintegrate Completely All the Meddling Deities in the Three Realms that Have a Hand in Interfering with Fa-Rectification"

"Among them are so-called "gods" who control the major religions of man, and who I asked to leave the Three Realms when I first began to impart the Fa, so as to give the people of the world equal opportunities to become Dafa disciples. Some of them did leave. But a portion would not, contending that people with religious affiliations would not get involved in the affairs of Dafa disciples during the Fa-rectification period. And they have not allowed people with religious affiliations to come to know Dafa--which has gone against the principle "Open to all, only what a person truly wants matters" [that we have] when spreading the Fa--and have failed to adjust to the change in situation that occurred during Fa-rectification.

Remembering the article instantly made me more clearheaded. I enlightened that when my heart began pounding at the practice site, I was being attacked by the meddling deities in other dimensions. I then remembered the quote from Teacher in the Book about this tribulation. I calmed down and began reading Zhuan Falun. I remembered the quote about this situation, but I could not remember where it was in the book. So, I opened to where I had left off the last time I had read. I began reading, turned the page and there was the quote. I started chuckling: I am always awed by how Teacher can make such thorough arrangements to help us. I looked up the same passage in the 2003 version where Teacher states,

" If you say you want to steel your will, then with this thought, at that time, you'll really be able to do that, and naturally you'll do well since your character has improved."

I said, "I want to steel my will," and most of the tribulation ended right then. I then reread Teacher's new article about the meddling deities and strengthened my mind. So how did I draw this tribulation to myself? Some of you probably already know. Even though my intentions were kind, why was I using the framework of his religion when trying to help the man in Manhattan? Once I entered that framework, I was limited to its power and rules. I have no doubt that when I started using that framework, the meddling deities used it as an excuse to pump all sorts of doubts into my head. These thoughts were not my own.

At the same time, I saw some emails on a New York City email list in which practitioners were quoting Teacher's recent article "Further Remarks on Politics:"

Thus the CCP has once again, so as to confuse right and wrong, pulled out the bogus line that Falun Gong students are "getting political." They do so to confuse those whose thoughts are being led along by the CCP and yet think they are clear on things, vainly attempting to sustain the persecution and give it theoretical grounds. The truth is, mankind's "politics" was not designed for the persecutors' use. If "getting political" can expose the persecution, if "getting political" can stop the persecution, if "getting political" can help clarify the facts, if "getting political" can save sentient beings--if "getting political" can do all of this good, then why not do so?

Well, mankind's religions were not designed to persecute us either. Teacher's words in this article reminded that I cannot afford to get caught up in any of the old force accusations or logic. If I have another encounter with a religious person, I will simply do my best to explain the goodness of Dafa from within the Fa, without talking at too high of a level or being attached to the results.

There were omissions that I had that brought this tribulation to me, but I now wish to talk directly about our websites. I have no doubt that if I had not had access to Teacher's new articles, the tribulation would have last much longer, and I would have suffered much more. Having Teacher's new articles available on the website helps countless practitioners around the world every day.

I sometimes forget how fortunate I am to have such easy access to Dafa websites living a middle class existence in a Western country. So many people in China are blocked from Dafa websites, and may in remote areas huddle around a single Internet connection or share hard-to-obtain print copies of articles and lectures.

Being able to read practitioner's articles on our websites also helps me greatly. For instance, July 1 was the sixth anniversary of when I was told about Falun Dafa. So, I decided to take stock of myself that day and read some of the practitioners exchange insights to help with the self-assessment. Magically, several of the articles focused on practitioners whose overall cultivation was similar to mine. They were about practitioners who had done well in certain respects, but who were also going through difficult situations arranged by the old forces because there were gaps in their cultivation that they had waited too long to address. Reading these practitioners articles helped strengthen my resolve to do better.

So, I encourage everyone to share about how our truth clarification work helps us and enables us to more fully participate in the Fa Rectification. Dafa websites help so many practitioners and non-practitioners in so many ways. Talking about them through our own experiences will enrich and improve the cultivation environment within these projects.

Thank you.

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