The Young Dafa Practitioner in My Home
By a Falun Dafa practitioner from China
(Clearwisdom.net) Many problems we encounter in educating young Dafa practitioners are actually
caused by our adult attachments. My daughter is also a practitioner and she is
now 14 years old. Today I look back at her progress and surprisingly find that
it is a reflection of my cultivation progress and the improvement of my xinxing.
It was very painful sometimes. But most of the time, I experienced Teacher's
tremendous benevolence. When my child was young, I often took her to group Fa-study and let her
participate in the large-scale Fa spreading activities. She acted
like a practitioner, saying, "Hardship is a good thing." Since 1999,
we have lost the environment of group Fa-study. In 2000, I went to Beijing to
appeal for justice for Falun Gong and was constantly harassed by the police
after I returned home. My family members who did not practice would not allow me
to take my child to study the Fa again. They frequently repeated the lies
broadcast on TV to her and deceived her, saying, "Do not listen to your
mother. Your mother went to Beijing because she did not want you any more."
My child was really scared and refused to listen to anything I said. She was six
years old at the time. During the following few years, I practiced on and off. I knew Dafa was good
and I did not want to give it up, but I had little desire to study the Fa. Most
of the time I struggled. My daughter went to school and she started to accept
the lies from the school's textbooks. But compassionate Teacher gave me hints again and again. Finally in 2004, I
started to study Zhuan Falun again. I received a hand-written
copy of truth-clarifying material from a practitioner and learned how to go to
the Minghui website (Chinese version of Clearwisdom.net). I started to practice
Dafa again. I started to clarify the truth to my child, but with
strong attachments. I wished she could return to cultivation so we could
cultivate diligently together, since there were no other practitioners around.
With this attachment, every time I tried to talk to her, it turned into a fight.
After the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party was
published, I tried to persuade her to quit the Young Pioneers. But she did not
agree. I looked inward and I found I had the attachment of sentiment. I did not
want my child to be hurt. I was never so anxious when I clarified the truth to
others. I also had the attachments of showing off and competitiveness, trying to
persuade my daughter to be on my side. It seemed like I had found many of my
attachments, but things still did not change. What was wrong? My cultivation state was not good. I felt no excitement in cultivating and I
saw so many cases of persecution that my fear made me lose confidence in
cultivation. Could I break through this huge tribulation? I could not even get
this former young practitioner to understand the truth, so who else could I
clarify the truth to? My attachment to getting results was generating a huge
tribulation, which I could not pass. I really felt I had come to a dead end and
there was no way to go further. Should I just give up? "Study the Fa"--that was the only thing I could think of at that
moment. In regards to leading my child to study the Fa, I had the thought of not
pushing her anymore. With a firm belief in Teacher and the Fa, I thought that if
my child can become a practitioner, Teacher will help her (I think it was my
righteous thought at that time). Just two days later, my child asked me,
"Mother, could you please help me quit the Young Pioneers?" I was very
happy and immediately published the announcement for her. After that, she
started to read truth-clarifying materials and "Minghui Weekly,"
listen to Minghui Radio, and so on. She also started to study the Fa and read
Hong Yin and Hong Yin II. In the beginning, my daughter did not spend a lot of time studying. At first
she read one of Teacher's poems every month, then later she could read one each
week. Finally, she could read Hong Yin II three times in one day. The
whole process lasted about two years. During that time, it was always me who
asked her to study and she just passively followed my directions. During those
two years, compassionate Teacher showed her many miraculous things. For example,
her academic marks improved and a fever disappeared in one day when she went
through a tribulation (this had never happened before). She also believed in the
Fa more and more. She was still in the passive state of Fa-study. She never did the exercises
and only studied the Fa before a school exam or when she felt physically
uncomfortable. She even bargained with me about my assignment of Fa-study to
her. I was very angry and frequently spoke harshly to her. I said that she did
not deserve to be a young Dafa disciple and she should give up and go back to
being an everyday person. I also said Teacher would be very sad because of
practitioners like her. I was not behaving like a practitioner. Even worse, when
I got very angry, I slapped her. I would shout at her, "Do you want to
cultivate the Fa or not? Tell me seriously." I did not want to waste
tremendous time and effort on her. Now when I recall this, I realize I was
scared. If she really gave up cultivation, it would be a serious sin for me. This young practitioner was very patient. When I yelled at her, she never
said a word; instead, she just listened to me. I paid attention to my appearance
when I was in front of other practitioners or regular people. But in front of
her, I did not care. She became my target to release my anger. She reminded me,
"What you tell me also applies to you." I suddenly realized my
mistakes. But after that, I made the same mistakes again. It was very painful. I
told her, "I am also a practitioner and I also have many human notions. If
I cannot control my anger and yell at you again, please use the wooden stick to
knock the bed frame or the cup. Then I will realize that you are not fighting
back. Instead, you will remind me and make my mind clear." We agreed to
cultivate diligently together. I really appreciate Teacher's arrangement of letting such a good practitioner
walk beside me. During that period, the sound of knocking on the bed frame or
cup frequently came out of my home. She never abused this right. Every time I
did not control my xinxing, she knocked. Sometimes when she
knocked the cup and walked toward me, I said, "Stop knocking and get away.
What if I just stop talking?" I actually did not cultivate well and each
time it took a long time for me to pass my xinxing test. Now I recall
that I have not heard the sound of knocking cups for almost two years. It was
only through writing this article that both my daughter and I remembered this
experience. In 2006, she started to recite Zhuan Falun and study
Teacher's new articles. She began to study the Fa for two hours every day.
During the winter and on summer vacations, she practiced the exercises at home
every day using the 30-minute exercise tape. When the new semester started, she
got up at 5:10 every morning and studied the Fa until 5:45. Then she ate
breakfast and went to school. She sometimes sent forth righteous thoughts at six
o'clock, sometimes not. Every day she used paper money on which was written
facts regarding the truth of Dafa and clarified the truth to her classmates. The
environment in her class was very good. If anyone received a bill with
truth-clarifying words on it, he/she would tell others the content. With this
young practitioner's lead, her many classmates all wanted to see it. When some
student who did not know the truth tore up the bill, other students would
surround him/her and condemn the behavior. I think as adult practitioners, we must do the three things well
and cultivate ourselves well. This is the key to leading young practitioners
well. We should not look down on young practitioners. Their minds are less
distracted and very pure. They sometimes love to play, and we should also look
at this with compassion. When we just started to practice Dafa, we had many
human notions and did not cultivate diligently. We repeatedly asked Teacher
questions that we would be ashamed to ask now. Our compassionate Teacher
answered our shallow questions again and again with patience. He did not look
down on us. With Teacher's protection and help, we have walked our paths. We do
not have any right to accuse young practitioners of anything. Even when we spend
a lot of effort on the young, compared to Teacher, our efforts are so little.
Leading the children well is our great responsibility. We must look inward and
cultivate ourselves well in order to lead them well. This is my personal understanding. If there is anything improper, please
kindly point it out. September 25, 2008
Chinese version available at
http://minghui.org/mh/articles/2008/9/25/186513.html
Yearly Archive
Printer Version
feedback@clearwisdom.net