My Understanding of Maintaining Harmony in the Family

By an Indian practitioner

(Clearwisdom.net) I am a housewife from a middle class family, and my husband and I are both in the teaching profession. We have a modest income, and we have a five-year-old daughter. My husband and I have had a happy marriage, and we respect each other's views on most things. Even when we have disagreements, they soon get resolved because my husband has a way of apologizing if he is wrong, and that has humbled me many a time to accept my faults, too.

My husband was introduced to Dafa where he teaches. He took to Dafa sincerely, doing the exercises regularly and reading the books. Soon after he started, he wanted me to take up the exercises and read the books. The books seemed difficult to read and understand and the Chinese words seemed so alien. But a veteran practitioner who visited my husband encouraged me to read the book with her.

I liked what I read and felt in my heart that this was definitely something very righteous. Soon after I took up the practice, my husband got very busy with more teaching assignments and more administrative responsibilities. I got a little perturbed by these new developments and started wondering if these were tests for my husband and me. I called up the practitioner and expressed my doubts, and she reassured me that whatever was happening was for the good and to keep doing the exercises and reading the book.

In the meantime, my husband and I told our parents about Dafa and showed them the exercises and the books. Since our parents are conservative in their thinking, they looked at the exercises and the books with a little trepidation, as something "foreign" encroaching on their age-old, traditional beliefs. But our little daughter astonished them by telling them about truthfulness and kindness.

I love and respect my parents and in-laws. In fact, my in-laws tell everyone that they have found an ideal daughter-in-law in me.

After reading the Dafa books, I had a lot of questions. I was in a dilemma. I was concerned that I might create discord with my parents and in-laws if I did not observe certain religious rituals which the family performed as a tradition. I discussed it with my husband, and we decided we would go through the motions of the rituals without any emotions. Then I thought to myself, "Am I being true to myself? Is this one of my attachments being exposed?"

I discussed it with the veteran practitioner and she told me that, in her understanding, it was all right to go through the rituals to maintain harmony in the family. She said she, too, had to go through the rituals for sometime before she could give up everything. She said that, now, if she is compelled to attend any religious ceremonies in the family, in her heart she recites Lunyu or says "'Truthfulness, Compassion, Forbearance' is good" or "Falun Dafa is good." She also said how there were Feng Shui objects in her house and once she got a better understanding of Dafa, she could remove them easily. But when some overseas practitioners suggested that she remove several icons, she did not want to upset the rest of the family elders. She reasoned that the icons in their living room were more like art objects, but the icons in their tiny prayer room were worshiped. Her husband, too, was reluctant to discard the icons. He said that since they don't worship the icons in the living room or ask for any favors, it was all right to keep them. Besides, he said if he got rid of the icons, people would think he was into some kind of newfound religion, and that would be doing a disfavor to Dafa.

She said as she continued her cultivation in Dafa, she felt she was guided and presented with opportunities for breakthroughs. In fact, one day her husband said they could gift all the icons in the prayer room to a nearby temple!

A couple of months back, there was a Hindu Festival where one is supposed to fast throughout the day and read the scriptures throughout the night. Since my parents and in-laws happened to be out of town during the festival, the practitioner we knew suggested that we read Zhuan Falun through the night. We completed most of Zhuan Falun through the night and finished it by the next afternoon. A lot of the concepts became clear to me.

I was wondering to myself what I would do at the big festival coming up in the next few months where the entire family gets together to read the scriptures.
I am a relatively new practitioner, and my understanding must be at the very rudimentary level. In my understanding, I have to maintain harmony in the family, keeping in mind what Master has said in Zhuan Falun:

"In our school of practice, those who practice cultivation among everyday people are required to practice cultivation precisely in ordinary human society, and to fit in among everyday people as much as possible."

Teacher said:

"You still have to walk the path of cultivation yourselves. To walk this path well and progress to its end--nothing is more extraordinary. I say that because during the journey you will have hardships, tests of every sort, unforeseen ordeals, and you will have unexpected interference from all kinds of attachments and emotion. The interference will come from family, society, good friends, and even fellow cultivators. And along with this there is interference from changes in the state of human society and from human notions that were formed in society. All of those things can drag you back to being like an ordinary person. But if you can break through all of it, you can advance towards godhood." ("Teaching the Fa at the Western U.S. International Fa Conference")

I feel the elders in the family practice a classical religion which Master says is also a cultivation way. Since Falun Dafa is a righteous cultivation way, I think it will clear the negative energy field around me. I will cross that bridge when I come to it, and I am sure Master will guide and help me not only to make the right choice but also the right move so that there will always be harmony in the family. I won't push the family to take up Dafa cultivation, but if they have a predestined relationship they will come to Dafa.

As a practitioner it is my duty to project the noble side of Dafa and always be on my best behavior.

At my level, this is my understanding of maintaining harmony in the family and society.

Please point out any gaps or anything incorrect.

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