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I Recognized my Attachment of Pride from my Child’s Behavior

July 15, 2006 |  

(Clearwidsom.net)

A couple of days ago, while I was talking about my child’s behavior with a fellow practitioner, I recognized that a child’s behavior is a mirror reflecting one’s cultivation status. My child seldom greeted, and even looked down on my colleagues and my neighbors. I was quite distressed by my child’s impoliteness. I looked into myself to see if I had the attachment to "honor," and to the expectation that my colleagues and neighbors should praise my child because the child of a Dafa practitioner should be outstanding. Or maybe I was trying to prove something about myself through my child. The fellow practitioner reminded me that it might be my own "pride" being reflected through my child and I should inspect myself.

I was shocked to find the mentality of pride. It was the most apparent trait I had before I began practicing Dafa. I thought I had already eliminated it. The discussion I had with this practitioner made me realize that I should look inward to examine myself very seriously. I remember one time at a party my husband mentioned to our friends that the reason he pursued me was because of my "being aloof." I had already changed so much, and I wondered why my husband still talked like that. I did not realize that Master was trying to enlighten me that I should eliminate this mentality.

In the article "Humbleness and Pride" from the seventy first issue of "Minghui Weekly" it says that one’s pride comes from the exterior, not the interior. Exterior strengths such as money, family standing, clan, etc. are very powerful. What these strengths conquer first is their owner. It is exactly this kind of strength which lifts up its owner so as to make its owner appear proud." When I first read the title of the article I was touched a little bit but did not think further. I never realized that the mentality of pride arises from exterior factors, not from one’s own original and pure inner self. Instead, consciously or unconsciously I regarded it as my inborn quality. It was hidden very deeply at the bottom of my consciousness, deep in my brain and thoughts. I always thought it was a good quality and intentionally maintained it within me. I read many ordinary people’s articles regarding the saying that one should be proud but not overbearing. Pride can enable one to adhere steadfastly to principles and not to follow the currents in sailing. But pride can also expand one’s ego, leading one to be arrogant and go to extremes.

Now, I realize that pride is truly an ordinary being’s mentality. It is a notion that an ordinary being develops and has to be eliminated. A cultivator has to eliminate all kinds of human notions so as to be a non-selfish enlightened being. If the bad behavior of my child originated from my notion, I have to rectify myself first. Then the field around me will be rectified and my child will be changed too, consequently. The essential change is from within and cannot be attained by exterior forces.