(Shared at 2001 European Conference)

To my fellow practitioners in China:

My name is Anne. I started my cultivation journey in April 1995, when Master Li gave a 7-day-lecture in Sweden. Although I didn't know very much about qigong or meditation at that time, I could feel the righteousness, purity and harmony of Master Li deep in my heart. The lectures answered so many of the questions that had burdened my heart for a long time. I felt relieved. Master Li seemed to be the teacher and the father who helped me to see the difference between right and wrong. By cultivating Falun Dafa I could return to my true home. I felt great compassion coming from Master Li.

In the beginning we didn't have any Dafa books in Sweden. We got China Falun Gong in English during our first journey to Beijing at the end of 1995. To be in China, to meet so many Chinese practitioners and to exchange experiences with them helped deepen my understanding of Dafa. I felt the urgent need to understand more. So I went to China by myself in 1996, returning to Sweden in the spring of 1997. I had even clearer understanding of cultivation and decided to study Chinese at the University.

In April 1999, the situation for the practitioners in China suddenly changed. So did mine in Sweden, and even more so after Falun Gong was banned in China in July 1999. The Swedish practitioners, instead of being quiet and remaining in the background now had to step forward to tell the world about Falun Gong. I was chosen to be on a TV show and to be interviewed by journalists. It was not a small test for me. I have always been a shy person. I find it hard to talk in front of people. Since I started cultivating, I have felt sadness about not being able to express my thoughts about Dafa to others. One day I was asked to be interviewed on a TV show the next morning. My first reaction was, "No! I am not the one who should do it." So I tried to get other practitioners to take part in it. One practitioner said, "I can join you, but if they only can take one, you have to go."

I called the TV studio and told them there would be two persons taking part in the show. But they told me they only needed one. I thought to myself, "If I make my human attachment more important than Dafa, we will loose this great opportunity. Can I live with that? Can I regard myself as a genuine practitioner if I can't even let go of a simple attachment like this?" I understood how this test helped me to let go of my fear of not being good enough. Master Li said in "Genuine Cultivation," "I have never felt bitter for the numerous hardships I have suffered. Then what do you have that still can not be relinquished?" The next morning at the TV-studio, I thought to myself, "I am a Dafa practitioner. I will just talk from my heart according to Zhen-Shan-Ren. I became very calm. Everything went very smoothly.

In January 1999, a professor in the Chinese department advised me to apply for a scholarship to study Chinese in China. At that time I didn't have any thoughts of going to China. Although I applied on the deadline day, I didn't want to travel to China. After many interviews, in July, I actually got the scholarship to study in China. It was hard for me to decide what to do. I felt I should go. I talked to my fellow practitioners for help. Some of them told me not to leave. We had too much to do here. I wouldn't be able to make contact with the practitioners in China anyway. My head was aching because I used the human way of thinking. I reasoned that China wouldn't give me a visa anyway because I had been on TV and in the Newspapers too much. It was another reason to hide behind my own fear and disbelief from Master Li and from the Fa.

I got enlightened that my first thought, to go to China, was the most important. In fact every step I took and every move I made was important. On my way to the Embassy I remembered something that Master Li had told us. Master Li says in Zhuan Falun 2, "BuddhaNature," "Once a notion is formed, it can govern a person's life, dominate his mind and even his happiness, anger, grief and joy. It is something acquired." Master Li says later in this article, "If one does not form any notion, when viewing a problem, he would have an understanding out of his good nature, the real understanding of his own and deal with the problem with kindness." I understood that I shouldn't use the human way to think about what to do nor should I be limited to the human way of solving it either. I should use the side that understands the Fa. I should therefore keep an unmoved, peaceful, and clear mind without deciding in advance whether to go or not. When I went to the Chinese Embassy, they gave me a visa to enter China.

Before I left, a fellow practitioner suggested that I not make any contact with practitioners in Mainland China. In this way I wouldn't cause them any problems. I thought I had to witness the situation in China for myself before deciding whether to contact them. For the first month I just watched the situation in China. I felt very lonely. Deep in my heart I longed to know how my fellow practitioners were doing. During this period of loneliness, I had time to look inside myself and find some of my attachments. After a month, I called a practitioner. After hearing the practitioner's voice I felt happy and relieved. We met at a restaurant. When I saw her my eyes filled with tears for the suffering she had gone through. I was so happy to meet her. Although we had never seen each other before, we had a lot to share. She told me her situation. I felt happy to know that they still kept practicing despite the crackdown. Many practitioners had gone to Beijing to appeal to the Chinese Government to take back the arrest warrant of Master Li, to release all Falun Dafa practitioners and to restore the reputation of Falun Dafa.

I didn't hear from her until several weeks later. We met again, but this time at her place. We could speak freely there. My understanding of the situation deepened. We shared our understanding of Fa and how we could assist our Master in the Fa rectification. We listened to the Dutch Media's interview with Master Li. When I left, she asked me to come and study the Fa with her next week. When I contacted her to make arrangements, she didn't answer. I thought I had lost contact with her. One night about three weeks later I was going through "karma elimination" and couldn't sleep. One part of me told me to do the meditation but the other part wanted to rest. This continued for the whole night. I felt very tired but when the phone rang in the morning I felt much better. It was my fellow practitioner. I was so glad to hear from her again. She asked if I would come to Beijing. I had been longing to go there and wondering how I could find other practitioners. Later she told me that when she had done meditation that night her thoughts had gone to me.

When I arrived in Beijing, she told me we would join a press conference. We went to a hairdresser. This day around 30 practitioners would tell the world media what Falun Dafa was and what was the situation of Falun Gong in China. Many of these practitioners had remained in Beijing for a long time waiting for a chance to appeal and to say that Falun Dafa was good. At the meeting I met a 10-year-old boy. He was not afraid of being arrested. During the press conference, I got tears in my eyes many times. I looked at these practitioners who had lost everything. Yet they never gave up their belief in Falun Dafa. Wasn't this to show compassion to the world and at the same time help other practitioners in Mainland China and overseas to wake up and to step forward? They looked so pure and they had come here from far away just to tell the world about the truth of Falun Gong.

In the lecture at the Western US Conference, Master Li says, "A Buddha or a God is able to give up his life for all beings and for the benefit of the cosmos. He is able to calmly abandon everything, with his heart being unmoved." After the press conference I met even more practitioners and heard even more touching stories. At this moment I knew how important it was for me to be part of the Fa rectification. I recalled a poem Master Li wrote in Hong Yin, "Making a wish to save sentient beings, Assisting teacher in his journey in this world; Aiding my turning the Fa wheel, Obtain the Fa and be free in heaven and on earth."

I stayed in Beijing for a couple of weeks to help make contacts with overseas journalists. One week after I returned to the school, I learned that some overseas practitioners were in Guangzhou City. I felt compelled to go there. On the way to meet them, I felt happier and happier as if I came closer to my destination of returning to my true home. Two practitioners met me at the airport and I met many more practitioners in the evening. I had seen some of them earlier in Beijing. All of us were busy preparing for next day's experience-sharing conference and meeting some overseas' media.

Late that night, the police suddenly came into our apartment to arrest us. I was quite calm. We asked the policeman to allow us to take a photo of ourselves in the apartment. They let us do it. With smiles on our faces, we took a picture together. In this difficult situation, they still regarded themselves as cultivators, and even at the police station they showed a heart of compassion. They asked how I was doing. Even in the biggest tribulation they were thinking of others before themselves. Doesn't this show that they had already let go of selfishness and human notions?

At the police station the policemen were asking the other practitioners many questions. I was surprised how quickly the practitioners could reply to the questions from the point view of Dafa. A policeman questioned me, also. I never felt any fear. I knew that if I had to stay here I would always remember to act as a cultivator and follow the Fa. They kept us in the police station without giving us any reason. They kept me in a separate room. I could hear the police shouting at the practitioners in other rooms. I was forbidden to meet any friends or make any phone calls. I took a chance to tell the policeman about the benefit of Falun Gong and that many people practiced Falun Gong in Sweden and in other western countries. In the afternoon, a group of important men came to the office and asked me to show them what I had in my bag. I refused. I told them that I wanted to contact the Swedish Embassy. They asked again and I insisted on contacting the Embassy. Then they just left. If I hadn't believed in the power of Dafa I would have been very scared at that moment.

They released me after 14 hours, and drove me to a hotel. I decided to stay there for a day in order to send out the picture we took. The next day I found a place to send the picture via the Internet. Having contacted a Finnish journalist in China, I got to know that the news about us being arrested had already reached the rest of the world. On the way back to the hotel, I just started to laugh to myself. I suddenly understood how important every one of us was in the Fa rectification process.

When I returned to the school, my teacher started to repeat those lies about Falun Gong. I am a practitioner and it was my chance to tell my teacher and my classmates the truth. I told them that many people outside China practiced too. The teacher didn't mention Falun Gong in the class any more. Later, an officer from the foreign affairs department in the school got a call from the city police station asking if the student whose name was Anne still practiced Falun Gong or not. He answered he didn't know. He called me to the office afterwards and asked me not to practice Falun Gong outside but it was OK to do it inside my room. He told me he had a good friend who also practiced Falun Gong and it was all right with him as long as I thought it was good for my well being.

Returning back to Sweden was a shock for me. I found it difficult to share my experiences with others. Instead of sharing, I kept things to myself. Now I realise how important it is to share our understanding and our experience with each other, especially now, in assisting Master Li in the Fa-rectification process.

To stay in China has been very important for my further cultivation. I want to send my deepest respect to all of my fellow practitioners in China who in one way or another showed me the importance of "Validate the Fa with reason, clarify the truth with wisdom, spread the Fa and offer people salvation with benevolence." (Rationality)