In Fa-Rectification, It Is Very Important to Reach Consummation as One Body
By a Western practitioner from Canada
As we continue to clarify the true situation we must strive diligently to
apply the principles of Dafa in every aspect of our lives so we can do our Dafa
work well and so we can also leave a solid example for future generations My marriage has helped me to realize the importance of true cultivation
during Fa rectification. It has helped to truly harmonize everything in our
lives as one body, together and not alone. To truly make efforts to look within
and live every moment within Dafa's principles is, in my understanding, true Fa
rectification. It is not a matter of formalities such as being alone or being married, or
forsaking material things in the human world. It all has to do with one's heart.
For a long time I was scared to think about marriage or having a family. Deep
down I didn't know if I could handle a relationship, although my desire to get
married has always been a huge attachment. Because of this attachment I felt I went to an extreme. I felt I wasn't
taking things naturally. I felt a lot of pressure and stress to suppress this
attachment. For 10 years, I chose to be by myself. When I started to cultivate I
thought I would probably live alone forever and cultivate by myself within the
boundaries of my own comfort level. I didn't think I could handle the
responsibility to think of another person during this time. I had too much Dafa
work to do. I told myself, "This is Fa rectification." I remember Master said,
don't think about anything else. One day as I drove my car the uncontrollable
feeling to have a partner swelled up inside me. I tried to eliminate the desire.
It was so strong I felt I couldn't control it. I called out for Master to help
me. Thirty seconds later I enlightened to the reality that I was a Dafa disciple
and this gift of the Fa was the highest honor in the universe. I realized that I
would give up everything to follow Teacher no matter if it took my entire life
time which I knew was only a tiny second, a blink of an eye in the vast journey
of my existence. To sacrifice my wants was the smallest thing I could do in
order to truly and fundamentally focus on helping Master to rectify the
universe. At that moment I felt totally at peace. I felt I had truly and calmly
and finally let go of my deep desire. Then came this girl. We met in 2000 at the Geneva Fa conference. We met again
this summer in another country doing Dafa work. I felt so good being around her.
I asked her to come and visit me in Canada. She came in June. During the time we
were together we communicated very well. We had so much respect for each other's
understandings and our ability to look inside and to share. I felt like all my
beautiful dreams and wishes for a relationship had been answered. I had met a
fellow practitioner who I felt was everything I have ever wanted in a partner. I
felt so lucky to be with her. I asked her to stay with me in Canada and on
August 1st we were married. I felt that I had everything in control. I felt strong and focused and knew
that this was the next step on my path. I felt no fear in my decision
whatsoever. On August 2nd everything changed. I felt so confused and I felt extreme fear.
My mind filled with so many destructive thoughts. Am I following Teacher closely
or did I just follow my desires and attachments? Did I just fail a lifetime
test? Did I just fall into the human world? Should I have been single minded in
what I have to do during Fa rectification? I had a hard time seeing things from
the perspective of the Fa. How do we best help Teacher in this time? In the days that followed it started to become very clear why Master arranged
my new path. I really didn't ever let go of my attachments fundamentally. I
didn't truly live my life within the basic principles of Dafa and
Truthfulness-Compassion-Tolerance. I had so many deep attachments that I had hid
from facing when I had been alone. These attachments were still there. They
controlled my actions during Fa rectification and I didn't even know it. When I
was alone I never made the effort to really dig deep into my self. When
tribulations happened in the group I would just superficially realize the
principles and sooner or later the situation would pass. I didn't really dig my
attachments out from the roots because I never really wanted to face the pain
within the group. Now I was married and I couldn't run away. I had to face my attachments with
another person, 24hours a day. The demon of comfort also joined the party. I felt so comfortable being
married and the comfort slowly turned into laziness. I started to feel my level
start to slip. My mind became less focused when I sent forth righteous thoughts
and I found it difficult to control my speech as a practitioner. I would say
evil things even before I realized that they left my mouth. When we saw this we
both realized that we must become extremely diligent in order to break through
this tribulation. á My wife brought it to my attention that I had become an expert at finding the
shortcomings of other practitioners. A few times my awareness has helped some
practitioners really see their situation and shortcomings. I felt pretty good
about myself. My desire to focus on others started to affect my reading.
Whenever I read the book passages would jump out at me and I would say to
myself, "Oh this practitioner should really read this passage; it's just what he
needs," or" Wow that practitioner must read this-- it really points out his
attachments." It seems I read the Fa in order to "fix" others rather than
cultivate myself. A few weeks ago my attachment blew up in my face. There was a situation in my city where practitioners were threatened by
police that they would be arrested if they didn't comply with certain
regulations when they handed out flyers in an important area. In the middle of
the meeting I told everyone that I felt it was the over- zealousness of the
older practitioners that caused the situation. They were too stubborn and had
created this conflict by their pursuits. In a room full of practitioners a Chinese practitioner talked very sternly to
me. He told me that I had no respect for the Chinese practitioners and that I
was deceived just like the Chinese citizens because I was conforming to the old
forces' arrangements to also persecute the Chinese practitioners because of my
lack of understanding, which was shown in my quickness to blame them for the
problem. I was floored. It took all I had to keep my mouth shut and to listen to this
practitioner. I was so upset. I left the room and drove home fighting back the
reaction to confront him and defend myself. I instead said to myself, "What have
I done to bring this kind of response?" "Why would he say this to me if there
wasn't a reason for it?" Through all of this I felt pain and confusion. I realized that deep in my heart, because of my great ability to point the
finger at others, I had lost all compassion, kindness and understanding in this
situation. I didn't take the time or the effort to really listen to my fellow
practitioners and to learn how they think and what their understanding was from
the Fa's perspective. I just thought only of myself and what wisdom "I" was
going to enlighten the group with. I had taken the role to once again "teach"
others of their shortcomings. I felt I was right and I judged the actions of
other practitioners and gave criticism. I also realized that deep down I didn't
fully trust in my fellow practitioners and I truly did blame them for the
problem. I also realized that I as a western practitioner was nowhere to be found in
the past year at this site where the problem manifested itself. I had not taken
any initiative or responsibility to help my fellow Chinese practitioners who can
hardly speak any English, to clarify the truth to the police at all. I felt really bad that night and at the same time I felt like I was truly
cultivating because I had taken advantage of a great opportunity to look within.
Pointing out shortcomings in others had really become an attachment for me and
the demons started to use it to destroy the fibers of being one body with the
rest of my fellow practitioners. In "Non-Omission" (Essentials for Further
Advancement) Master discusses abandoning attachments. Master says, "If a
cultivator or an everyday person who cannot even make fundamental sacrifices
also discusses this principle, he is actually undermining the Fa by making
excuses for the attachments he cannot let go." I realized I wanted others to let
go of attachments and to see their shortcomings when I was still lost in my own
attachments of show off mentality and pride. This situation truly gave me the
wakeup call I needed to do better for my environment. Later a practitioner shared her view of the situation itself. She said that
we have been at this site for so long and have never taken the time to tell the
security about Dafa and the situation in China. They want to know so much. It is
the only reason why they are here on this planet and we still haven't told them
after all this time? Their beings in other spaces think, "We have waited here
for you to tell us about Dafa and you still don't; now we are going to arrest
you and force you to tell us about the Fa!" This view was so light hearted but also so solid. This perspective took the
heaviness away from the situation and opened up a new way of looking at it. She
also explained how as one body we all compose different parts of the whole. Some
practitioners are the nose, some are they eyes, some are the hands, some are the
legs and some are the mouths. We as westerners are the mouths that talk for the
face, the old Chinese practitioners who can't even speak English. "How can the
nose speak for the face?" "It is the mouth that has to speak for the entire
face!" A few days later some of us had a meeting with local police to rectify
another situation where they wanted us to remove some signs we had fixed in a
very important area. After our meeting the end result was that the signs could
stay where they were. This view also opened up a fresh idea of what one body is between Chinese and
westerners during Fa rectification. We all feel the deep respect for each other
from Chinese to westerner and from westerners to Chinese. There is no
separation. We are one body, as Master said in "Teaching the Fa at the
Washington, D.C. Conference" 2002: "You are all disciples in the same practice, and you are giving your all for
the cosmos' Fa-rectification, so you should cooperate well with one another."
"The next person's things are your things, and your things are his things. We
don't talk about the "unity" everyday people do, which is a forced, superficial
thing. You are cultivators, and your realms are higher." When I was able to eliminate my view of myself and my words I truly viewed my
fellow practitioners for who they really were and once again was able to see how
amazing and selfless my fellow practitioners are and I remembered how much
respect I had for them. As we go through our cultivation experiences, together
we learn and grow closer as one body. We share the most sacred bond together.
At this special time the cosmic climate is definitely changing. We can all
feel it. Personal consummation is not what it is all about any more. Teacher
gives us every opportunity to clarify the truth to people and gives us every
opportunity to grow together as one body. Lately the emails on the web lists
have become like they were in the beginning. Practitioners are openly and
honestly sharing their understandings and feelings with no blocks. They are
being compassionately answered by other fellow practitioners who are trying to
help them make it up the mountain. In my understanding our reaching consummation as one body is first and
foremost and the only way we can do this is to help each other to cultivate in
the Fa rectification. I am so honored to have this opportunity. Sometimes when I can't stand the
pain and confusion I look in the mirror and I have to laugh because in these
painful times when I just want to disappear and hide away from the world I truly
enlighten to the profoundness behind Masters words from Zhuan Falun,
"Whether you can practice cultivation all depends upon whether you can endure,
sacrifice, and suffer." ("Transformation of Karma," Lecture 4) This time is
truly precious and hard to come by. I hope I can look inside much more in order
to do better for the whole body. Let's work together with lighter hearts to
really do well together in this special time.
Chinese version available at
http://www.minghui.ca/mh/articles/2002/12/26/41720.html
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