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Removing my Attachment to Jealousy

(Clearwisdom.net) My in-laws had always favored my husband's brother and his family, which made me feel very uncomfortable. At the beginning, with constant Fa study, I was able to put up with it and pass various tests. For instance, my sister-in-law sometimes would scorn my child right in front of me, or she would brag about her fashionable hair style and clothes and pretty face, or my mother-in-law would give her child a box of soft drinks but not mine...If I had not controlled myself, I would have started a fight with her. But I managed to pass these tests.

However, I did very poorly dealing with another family issue. My husband's brother borrowed 2,000 yuan from us. After a long period of time, however, he still did not show any sign that he was going to return the money. I was very upset and often complained to my in-laws, who were very annoyed by me and sided with him instead of me. I felt I was extremely wronged and was suffering great injustice. All kinds of attachments popped up at that time, including anger, jealousy and chagrin. Unable to find a place to vent my anger at home, I went around complaining to my fellow practitioners. Now looking back, I realized I was also interfering with other practitioners at that time. I am very sorry for that. During that time, I also had a very tense relationship with my husband.

Teacher said in Zhuan Falun, "If jealousy isn't eliminated, all the thoughts you've cultivated become fragile." That's exactly right. When there was no conflict, I felt I was doing very well in cultivation. However, once conflicts came up, I found it extremely difficult to let go of attachments.

Later through studying the Fa and sharing experiences with fellow practitioners, I felt calm again. I was no longer occupied with family issues. I hope fellow practitioners who have the same attachment of jealousy as me will remove such an attachment as quickly as possible. "Today I'm telling practitioners: stop turning a blind eye to your problem. Your goal is to cultivate up to higher levels, so you have to get rid of jealousy. That's why I've singled it out." (Zhuan Falun)

Posting date: 3/1/2006
Original article date: 2/28/2006
Category: Practitioners' Insights
Chinese version available at http://www.minghui.ca/mh/articles/2006/2/15/120740.html

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