(Clearwisdom.net) On January 18, 2002, I was posting truth-clarifying materials when I was illegally arrested by the police. That same night, I was sent to the Ji County Detention Center and interrogated by staff from the local police station and the Ji County Police Station. When I did not tell them anything, they cruelly beat me and detained me.

Immediately after I entered the detention center, I found out that a practitioner who was on a hunger strike had been tied to an iron chair for 24 hours. We were allowed only one meal per day, consisting of two pieces of hard corn bread, often made from moldy corn powder. Many practitioners were detained in the detention center. Each day we studied the Fa together, sent forth righteous thoughts, and clarified the truth to the people around us. After more than one month in the detention center, I was illegally sentenced to two and a half years in prison and was transferred to the Banqiao Forced Labor Camp in Tianjin.

When I entered the forced labor camp, it was as though I was entering an evil den full of monsters. For Falun Gong practitioners, there is a rule that new prisoners must suffer pain from the very beginning. The camp employed collaborators to talk to me. They came one after another. They also tried to force me to write the "Four-No" letter (no learning, no exercising, no speaking and no spreading of Falun Gong) and to recite the "Four-Rules" (posted on the wall) used to restrain prisoners. If you did not comply with their demands, they would deprive you of sleep, force you to stand for long periods of time, or force you to perform hard labor, sometimes until 1 or 2 a.m.

One month after my arrival I was sent to the Fifth Corps section of the labor camp. There, the environment was very simple, but life was hard. At that time, I still had not written the "Four-No" letter. As a result, they forced me to stand day and night, and even told me when I could and could not use the bathroom. They also tried to "transform" me by having collaborators talk to me.

One day, when I went to the dining hall to get my food, I tore down a propaganda picture defaming Dafa. As a result, I was forced to stand for a long period of time. At night, a guard and a drug inmate turned off the lights and beat me, causing my chest to hurt for many days. They also did not allow me to sleep that night. Instead, I was forced to stand in a dark corner of the room wearing only underwear, even though it was winter time. I was forced to stand for more than five hours at a time, and was not allowed to go back into the building until after daybreak. In total, I was forced to stand for five or six days this way.

Once when I went on a hunger strike I was force-fed salt water. The prison guards grabbed my hair and shoved my head against the wall. I have been coughing severely since then.

One afternoon in the spring of 2004, the camp captain called me into his office. He told me to express regret for what I had done so that I could return home as soon as possible. I did not do as he said, and as a result, I was sent to a brainwashing center.

At the brainwashing center, three collaborators and a drug addict defamed Dafa, but I did not listen to them. As a result, they forced me onto a bed, with my head at my knees and both of my arms spread out. Then the drug addict beat me and threatened me. However, he stopped after realizing that I was not going to give in. Then a collaborator began to hit me on the head with a slipper. When the slipper broke, he used a different shoe that was thicker and had a bigger heel to continue to hit my head. The personnel on duty at the brainwashing center also came to kick and beat me. Although I was beaten until I saw stars, I only had one thought in my mind: "Firmly hold onto Dafa and never betray Dafa." Soon, my head swelled up from the beating. That night, I could not see anything and vomited all the watery food that I had eaten. This scared the prison guards, and they forced me to go to a hospital, where I received a transfusion overnight. Before dawn, I was sent back to the labor camp and told to go to the captain's washing room to recuperate. It took more than 10 days before the swelling went down. However, as soon as all my wounds recovered, I was forced to stand all day long, and beaten again by the same person from the brainwashing center. This time he used his fists to hit me. He also spat on my face and told the captain not to give me any food. As a result, I was given only half a piece of steamed bread for each meal.

Three weeks or so later I was returned to the labor camp. The prison guards surrounded and attacked me. They also tried to force me to write a repentance statement, which I firmly rejected.

The camp illegally extended my term for another six months because I refused to give up my belief in Falun Gong. When it was near the end of my extended sentence, two senior captains took turns persuading me to give up Falun Gong by using my attachment to sentimentality to my family. After almost three years I had missed many of Master's teachings. With a shallow understanding of the Fa, I was confused and did not know what to do when faced with this test. Regrettably, my determination in Dafa was shaken and my righteous thoughts weakened. Thus, I surrendered to them.

I returned home after three years, with all the wounds from the tortures I suffered, and with a sense of guilt toward Master and Dafa. I asked myself, "I was not afraid during the most evil and harsh times, why did I give up now?" It was already too late when I saw the light. I truly came to understand what Master said in his poem from Hongyin:

It takes cultivating the mind,
severing desires,
casting off attachments,
Lest man be lost in his ordeals


and gripped with deep regret.

(Hong Yin Version A, "Who Dares Renounce Human Attachments?")

It was the old forces who used qing to pull me down because I did not diligently study the Fa. From now on, I will negate everything set up by the old forces. Also, anything that I said and did that was not in line with the Fa or Master's requirements are now null and void. I will double my efforts to compensate for the losses that I have caused to Dafa, and tell the truth to sentient beings about the persecution that I suffered in the labor camp.