(Clearwisdom.net) I learned Falun Dafa in 1998 and have overcome a lot of difficulties in order to continue. My cultivation path was rather bumpy; however, I believe in Dafa and Teacher and have not been scared away by the Communist Party's brutal persecution. I have matured in the process. Of course, only those that are watched over by divine beings can manage to walk this far.
I work in accounting in a state-owned enterprise. Before I started the practise, my principles were: "I won't eat anything that's poisonous and I won't do anything that's illegal. I won't bother anyone, but if anyone crosses me, I will fight back and walk with my head held very high." If someone bumped into me on a bus, I would not hesitate to push back. I just took that for granted.
In 1998, one of my relatives introduced me to Falun Gong. Then I read in Zhuan Falun:
"This characteristic, Zhen-Shan-Ren, is the criterion for measuring good and bad in the universe. What's good or bad? It is judged by this. The de that we mentioned in the past is also the same. Certainly, the moral standard in today's society has already changed and become distorted." (Lecture 1)
I was very shaken, as if every word was directed at me.
I had to re-examine myself. At that time, people spent a lot of money eating out and on entertainment. I usually helped my boss record expenses to be reimbursed. I thought everybody did that and that if we did not offer people meals, we would not be able to get any business. When we went to the stationery store for office supplies, we were surprised that they also sold detergent and shampoo there. Staff at the store told us, "Go ahead and buy it. We can give you a receipt for stationery." We discussed it among ourselves, and since our boss wasted so much money eating lavish meals, why shouldn't we buy daily necessities for ourselves? I thought it was okay to do that at that time. Now I realize it was against the nature of the universe. I realized that I was pretty bad, not righteous or pure. I am so glad that I learned the Fa, otherwise, as a 50-year-old, I would not even be able to tell good from bad.
Since I started the practice, I have studied the Fa, done the exercises and followed the teachings. My body and mind have been cleansed. At work, at the headquarters of my company, I followed instructions and was very responsible.The company wanted to relocate some its staff to work at the branches. The working environment in the branches is usually not as good as at headquarters. Also, the branches are usually farther away and there were no shuttle buses either. No one wanted to go. In the end, I agreed to go. My colleagues said that I seemed to have changed. I know that I would not have done it if I had not been cultivating.
On July 20, 1999, the Party started to persecute Falun Gong. Before that, a dozen practitioners would do the exercises together in the meeting room at work every day after lunch. After the persecution started, only I continued. I maintained my faith in Teacher and the Fa, remembering that I should take the Fa as teacher. Everyday I continued to study the Fa and do the practice. I moved into the warehouse when they did not allow me to do the exercises in the meeting room. When the CCTV staged the Tiananmen Square self-immolation incident, my colleagues and my family members all tried to talk me into quitting. I said to them, "My teacher said that practitioners cannot kill lives. What they showed on TV is false." From then on, I did not watch TV any more. I had no time for something that was not true. My faith in the Fa and Teacher has never wavered.
I tried to do everything according to the standards of a cultivator and firmly safeguard Dafa. My employer did not submit my name when higher authorities looked for people practicing Falun Gong. I realized that Teacher was protecting me. Later on, I played the CDs brought back by my relatives from overseas and found out the facts about the self-immolation incident. I got in touch with other practitioners, and from then on I picked up truth clarifying materials to distribute.
Teacher said, "Validate the Fa with rationality, clarify the truth with wisdom, spread the Fa and save people with mercy"("Rationality," Essentials for Further Advancement II). I talked to colleagues about Falun Gong and read to them as well some of the truth clarifying materials. I also distributed the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party. Some people thought we were political. I said to them, "Some 10,000 practitioners went to Zhongnanhai to appeal. When they left, there was no garbage on the ground. Who could be this peaceful if they were political? Also, it is really not up to the government to define who is righteous and who is evil." Those who have read the Nine Commentaries thought that the CCP was rather evil. It was only natural that they quit the Party.
Over the past few years, everybody at work has learned that I practice Falun Gong. I have earned the trust and respect of the management of the company. I was given the responsibility of supervising three major projects. The general manager said that I was very righteous, responsible, and trustworthy. Each project is a big investment. He was confidant that I could do a good job.
As a practitioner, I feel that Teacher is beside me. My changes and improvement are due to Teacher's merciful saving and protection. Later on the government stipulated that our enterprise should be downsized. Females 50 and over were all forced to retire. I received a notice to go home. However, I also received another notice that allowed me to continue to work. I worked until I was 56.
The most magical moment happened the day before I retired. My colleague, an ordinary person, had her celestial eye opened when she was reading Teacher's articles. She saw divine beings. Everything that she thought was superstitious was displayed right in front of her. She was very excited. I encouraged her to improve her xinxing. With Teacher's compassion, she started the path of cultivation. I was very touched. I could feel Teacher's infinite grace.
After I retired, I set up a production site in my home. I download the "Minghui Weekly" Newspaper and Magazine, Teacher's new articles, and truth clarification materials and send them to people. Rain or shine, my priority is doing Dafa work. Nothing can stop me from following Teacher. Based on Minghui's list, I have tried to expose the culprits persecuting Falun Dafa by sending out copies of the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party and information about the practice of harvesting organs from living Falun Gong practitioners to these villains. Some of us did the copying, others did the mailing. We worked very well together. To keep doctors from participating in the persecution, I looked for the doctors and specialists' contact information in the hospitals and sent out copies of the Nine Commentaries and other information about the truth of Falun Gong to them.
I live in a dormitory owned by my former employer. At the entrance there is a monitor and someone is always there to register visitors. We all know each other so it was not easy for me to distribute materials. I decided to mail them, which was a very safe way.
I always have a few flyers on me. Whenever I have a chance, I leave them around, such as in the baskets on peoples' bikes. Once, on my way home and before I went upstairs, I left some flyers in the basket of a bike. Then it looked like it was going to rain. I looked down from the balcony and saw the flyers still there. I sent forth righteous thoughts so people would pick up the materials before they got rained on and damaged. By the time I finished sending righteous thoughts, the bike was gone. This is the magic and power of Dafa.
Everyday I think about what I have not done well. When I find a loophole, I send forth righteous thoughts to eradicate it. At the same time, I study the Fa and advance diligently. I go to a fellow practitioner's home on Mondays and Thursdays to study the Fa, watch Teacher's video, and read his articles. Other times, I study at home. I have discovered that I am impatient with my family members. I only realized it after an incident. From now on, I have to work harder and pay attention to my speech and behavior, follow Teacher's teaching and cultivate myself well, and advance diligently.
I have realized that only if I study the Fa more, look inward when there are conflicts, and cultivate myself well can I safeguard the dignity of Dafa.
August 15, 2007
