Being a Coordinator and Cultivating Myself

By a practitioner from China

(Clearwisdom.net) I believe that I need to make a fundamental breakthrough. My biggest problem is that I do Dafa work with human attachments, and at the same time, my attachment to doing things interferes with my Fa study.

In doing Dafa work, even if I have a breakthrough at the superficial level, I often fail to keep up with cultivation and to maintain righteous thoughts. The worst thing is that I neglect Fa-study or try to finish it quickly, like a task. I need to to look at everything I do from the perspective of Godhood so that I can be more efficient. From the perspective of xinxing, I need to cultivate my compassion when doing Dafa work.

Another problem occurs when dealing with my fellow practitioners. I shouldn't try to change others through my coordinating. We should always pay attention to cultivating ourselves. When a life returns to Godhood at the fundamental level, he can use all his supernormal powers to save sentient beings. Letting go of humanness is the most powerful way to harmonize the group as a whole. We need to cooperate with fellow practitioners to do things and remember to look within for our attachments. We are being tempered along with our fellow practitioners within the Fa; our purpose is not to help other practitioners to cultivate by focusing on their attachments. I did not realize this point until recently. Actually, if we always try to correct others and attempt to influence the whole body, it becomes an obstacle to cultivating ourselves well.

Our contacts may be many or few, but we have a standard--that is, we are not led by our attachments. We are not driven by the attachment to controlling things, the attachment to fame, or the attachment to self-importance.

Recently I discovered in myself a very strong attachment to controlling things. I almost tried to step into the position of "general coordinator." But at the same time, I don't have enough energy inside. Sometimes I even fall into a foggy state: I cannot get up early in the morning and feel unsettled, with endless conflicts in my mind. I remembered Master's warning about "breeding demons in your own mind."

Gradually I found the problem. I had the hidden attachments to fame and profit in doing Dafa work. These attachments are difficult to detect, which make them the most fundamental attachments.

Chinese version available at http://minghui.ca/mh/articles/2007/12/25/169003.html

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