(Clearwisdom.net) On Feb 3, 2004 the Ontario Superior Court of Justice awarded me $11,000.00 including court costs and found the Chinese Vice Consul General in Toronto guilty for defaming a Falun Gong practitioner in the newspaper.

For the past 4 years, Jiang and his followers have been spending hundreds of millions of dollars on a massive campaign of lies to eliminate Falun Gong and to hide their crimes against humanity. Hate and lies are the lifeblood of the persecution.

On May 1 2003, Pan Xinchun the Vice Consul General of China in Toronto spread the same hate into Canada by calling me a member of a "sinister cult" in a local news paper. This was yet another attempt by the regime to use consulates and Embassies overseas to eliminate support for Dafa and to harm Dafa.

I immediately realized the importance of this opportunity to expose and eliminate the evil from attacking Dafa here in Canada. However, when I was thinking about suing this person for his crimes, many of my attachments surfaced to try to stop me from going forward.

I was deeply afraid of the amount of money, the thousands of dollars I would have to spend on the case. I was also afraid of all the work that I would have to put into this case and I was afraid that I wouldn't be righteous enough to succeed. My fear heightened on the last day that I could file the claim. I talked to many practitioners to find an answer but I found everyone had their own understanding.

I felt very afraid. I remember in my past cultivation I had let many great chances to validate Dafa slip by because of my fear. Master gave me so many chances to step out of humanness and to let go of my attachment of self so I could truly put Dafa first, and I continued to fail.

Once again I felt Master arranged this test for me to step forward, but once again the fear was stopping me. I also knew deep in my heart that if I failed this test it would be a very serious step back in my cultivation.

I realized through all my past failures that the attachment of fear is the most dangerous and most serious test that blocked my way. And my fear of losing money or my fear of not succeeding or my fear of all my self interests and attachments that stopped me from truly stepping forward 100% from my heart for Dafa was really a deeper fear of the ultimate attachment to life and the fear of death.

So many practitioners in China have stepped forward and have given up all worries and fear of losing personal interest to validate the Fa in the most deadly environment ever in history. They are able to do this because from the bottom of their souls they truly believe and have faith in the truth of Dafa. They gave up their attachment to life and their fear of death for the ultimate sake of saving others.

I asked myself, am I still attached to reaching consummation? Am I worried about my own future or my own self interest? Do I truly understand what Master is teaching us? Am I afraid of my own life as a human being? Can I truly put myself aside and act with the righteous compassion to save others? Do I truly believe in Master and in Dafa?

At that moment my one thought became so strong in my mind. Yes. I must eliminate the evil. For the sake of all the innocent lives who are exposed to this hate and are being brainwashed to go against Zhen Shan Ren, I must expose the persecution and stop the evil from attacking Dafa. I also must support my fellow practitioners in China who have truly shown me the ultimate meaning of selflessness and compassion. This is my only true mission as a human being in this precious time.

I called Peter, the lawyer, who was shocked to hear from me. He said there is no way I could go forward any more. It was too late, I left it until the last day and he didn't even have the papers ready. It was 3:00 and the courts closed at 4:30. There was no way we could prepare and get it there in time. I told him I must go through with this case. This evil must be stopped so it will no longer hurt people. It is a matter of principle and it has to be done.

At 5:00 I received a call from Peter. He told me he rushed down to the court as fast as he could and he filed the case just before they closed. I felt happy. I felt that after I made the decision to place Dafa first over any fear, Master made the rest happen. Master tells us that the Fa protects the righteous principles.

I also found out that because I had not passed previous tests in my cultivation strictly and on time the tests accumulated and became more and more dangerous. All the tribulations from the past didn't just disappear after this victory, they defected and became stronger and larger.

The following week another one surfaced. When I told my family that I sued the consul general they became very angry. My father was very afraid. He screamed. It was like a demon possessed him. He tried everything to get me to stop. He threatened to fire me from our family owned business where I work. He called our family lawyer and took my name off all the family investments. He also took me out of his will. He then called the bank and took my name off all the accounts. He demanded I give him the name of my lawyer so he could call him and I refused. I felt numb. My whole body and mind felt surrounded by evil, just like someone threw a heavy iron blanket over me and threw me in a deep hole. However, through it all I could see that it was the evil itself that was afraid and trying to stop me. I felt a very strong righteous thought deep in my heart that no matter what I lost, nothing would stop me from stepping forward to protect Dafa.

As I continued to step forward I faced an even harder attack from the evil. This time they attacked my physically. As I flew to Ottawa to meet an important government official about my case, I could hardly walk. It felt like something was tightening my back to the point where the muscles were going to snap like strings too tight on an instrument. I made it though the meeting and to the airport. When I arrived home I couldn't get out of the plane. I was paralyzed with intense pain. I couldn't breath. I couldn't move. I couldn't talk. The stewardess called the medical people who brought a wheel chair. It took me 10 minutes to get out of the seat and into the wheel chair right next to me.

As I sat in the chair the pain settled down a bit. I told the lady to wheel me to my car. She tried to argue but I insisted. I made it into my car and relaxed a bit more. I drove home into my underground parking where a fellow practitioner and my wife met me. As I got out of the car the evil ripped into my body like massive red hot electric shocks and I dropped to my knees. I couldn't move. I lay in excruciating pain for hours beside my car trying to scream but in too much pain to do so. As I lay on the ground trying to breath between the contractions of intense pain I couldn't help thinking of the practitioners in China and how much torture they endure. Here, I was in the most pain I ever felt and I still had the comfort to just lay there beside my car on the cold concrete. Practitioners in China didn't have that luxury. I started to cry for them. I was finally dragged upstairs on a blanket into my apartment and there I lay in my foyer beside the front door for over a week. I could do nothing but think and read.

During this time I could see that most of my thoughts were not righteous at all. I would send righteous thoughts at 11 and 5 but it almost seemed like a formality. I saw that quickly after 11 and 5 my mind would wander to all kinds of dreams and fragmented thoughts and desires and pursuits.

I also had a notion in my mind that I didn't want practitioners to bother with my situation. It was my problem and I could handle it by myself. I had phone calls from practitioners who wanted to come over to send righteous thoughts for me and I refused to allow them. I felt I could do it alone. I then realized that I felt alone and overwhelmed.

I realized that I had not kept up my Fa study and doing my exercises everyday. I had grown a fear of doing the exercises. I didn't want to spend the time to do them because I felt other things were more important or I was too lazy. Now as I lay on the floor it seemed my privilege to do the exercises was taken away from me. I couldn't even sit up and I wished that I could do the exercises again. I felt truly sorry I took my privilege to do the exercises for granted and now my ability was gone.

I took the following days to read the Fa intensely and truly reflect on the principles in the book. I felt so refreshed and enlightened. I opened my heart to my fellow practitioners and sent an email asking everyone for their support. The response I received touched my heart. I could truly feel the righteous support from everyone.

It took a long time before I could walk again but I realized that I was giving into the evil arrangement to keep me down. I refused to allow that to happen and I started to focus again on the case.

I had a thought that I wanted to let practitioners all over the world take part in this case. I thought there must be a way that I could get the body of practitioners to use their energy to help as one body to eliminate evil. I came up with the idea to write a letter to all the Chinese consulate and embassy officials around the world telling them about this case hoping they would no longer harm the reputation of Dafa or they too would pay for their crimes in the future.

Practitioners from all over the world expressed their joy to be a part of this. I received emails from as far as Sweden, South Africa, Moldavia, Israel, New Zealand, Germany, Slovakia, Czech Republic, United Kingdom, Russia and others. I could truly feel the strong bond of the Dafa body come together. It was a powerful feeling.

However, in my own environment I became irritated with my local practitioners. For months many practitioners knew that this case was coming and everyone knew how important it was. It was the first time any where in the world a Chinese official was going to be tried for defaming Falun Gong practitioners. This case had so much importance for truth clarification.

However, practitioners were extremely busy with other very important projects and throughout the next 5 months I was mostly left alone to work on the case. At the last minute, only days before the hearing was to take place I was bombarded with concerns from practitioners who wanted to have conference calls to discuss, "How much we had not done with this case!" and that, "The lawyer is an everyday person, we must make sure he talks about the right things!" "We have to meet with him!" "We have to do this and this and this!"

My heart was moved and I expressed a serious pattern in the Dafa body that I have observed and have also been a part of since July 1999. That is when we have lots of time for important upcoming projects we never seem to cherish the time given to us to do a good job. It is only at the very last minute that everyone will jump in and want to change things and give their feedback and only after it is all over do we all come together and express how bad we feel and that we should have done better. I feel this is still an immaturity we all share.

I tried to calm my heart and listen. I learned I was still attached to my own ideas of how things should go and I still had the destructive habit of pointing the finger at others for their faults. I feel this surfaced to test if I could put my own thoughts aside and take others' hearts and concerns into consideration. We then came up with some points that we felt should be shared with the lawyer. We also all realized that we had to also trust the lawyer and our own work we had done in the past clarifying the truth to him.

It seemed 8 months went by in a second and the day for the trial was finally here.

As I sat in the courtroom it seemed like hundreds of practitioners came to the court to support. The lobby and the courtroom were packed with practitioners. Nothing could have matched the feeling I had even before the judge came into the room. I felt the amazing pure strength of all the practitioners sending righteous thoughts together with me defending the reputation of Dafa in a court of law and forging ahead together as one body to write another chapter in history. My heart filled with tears because I could feel the solid steel bond of all practitioners coming together with the righteous hearts to save sentient beings.

I also understood right then that between fellow practitioners, no matter what attachments surface in others the most important thought I must have is to realize we are all here because of Dafa and Master and whatever happens we all are bonded together with one common heart and one goal. In this moment I could truly feel the special bond we have between each of us and how we must support each other in everything we do no matter if it's our project or not.

Every one in the courtroom was silent because of the powerful field. I sent righteous support to my lawyer to do his best. I sent righteous support to the judge so he could choose well the most important decision he would ever make in his life and I let all the Zhen Shan Ren I had in my soul do the rest.

As I sat there I had a thought that I would have given everything and every cent I had to be there to eliminate the evil. It was one of the most powerful moments of my life. I also reflected back and realized how only 8 months earlier I almost let fear steal this precious chance away from me and destroy my opportunity to step forward for Dafa. I also realized that pain and fear, like any other tribulation, no matter how painful it is or how terrifying it is, it is just in that moment and when we look back it is over but our one thought at that time or our decision or our choice at that moment lasts forever.

Every opportunity Master gives us on our path will never come again and when they arise they go so fast. We only have one chance to choose well or not. I felt so grateful that Master gave me this opportunity and the power and strength to see it through.

In the hearing the judge asked the lawyer how much money we were seeking and my lawyer said we wanted over $100,000 due to the serious nature of this comment. The judge then said that if this was the case we would have to book another date for the court. At that point we had a decision to make. I pulled my lawyer aside and told him, "This is not about money, this is about principle. We must stop the evil from attacking Dafa. It has to be today." My lawyer explained my heart to the judge and she transferred us to another building so we could have our case heard that day.

For over an hour our lawyer presented a brilliant case filled with truth clarification to the judge. He also argued how Pan Xinchun acted outside his official functions as a consulate official and also broke international law and therefore he had no immunity.

The judge then asked my lawyer why he thought no one showed up to defend the Vice Consul General. My lawyer said, "For 8 months we gave the consulate four opportunities to step forward to defend themselves and they refused. They felt they were immune under diplomatic immunity and refused to accept the legal papers. The only reason they haven't come to defend themselves is because they are afraid. They are afraid of the mistake they made when they defamed my client in the newspaper. They are afraid to expose the disgusting abuses their government is responsible for against Falun Gong practitioners in China and they are afraid to be exposed for the massive hate campaign that they are responsible for spreading here in Canada. This is the reason."

At that point the judge smiled and nodded his head in agreement and at around 1:00 pm the judge ruled in our favor and we won the case.

I cried so hard I couldn't stop. I felt the energy of all practitioners in China together with us and felt the unexplainable power of our Dafa body in high dimensions and I felt so honored to be part of it.

It was a great victory for the Canadian courts to rule that calling Falun Gong an "evil cult" is illegal. However, in my heart I still felt heavy.

A reporter asked me if I was happy with the result and I told her, "For 4 years the Chinese regime has been using hate and lies to murder and torture and destroy innocent practitioners and to hide their crimes against humanity. So many of my fellow practitioners have died brutal and senseless deaths. Here in Canada the hate and lies still continue to be spread by the Chinese embassy and consulates. Only when all my fellow practitioners in China are free and only when all the hate and lies are eliminated and only when Jiang Zemin and all those who have hurt Falun Gong practitioners are brought to justice, only then I will be happy. For now I just want to send a strong message to all those who are hurting the reputation of Dafa and of practitioners, that you must stop before it is too late. In time you will all pay for your disgusting crimes and you will destroy your futures and the futures of your innocent families by your evil deeds."

When it was all over and I was driving back home, the picture of Pan Xinchun's face came into my mind. I felt deeply sad in my heart that this human being had chosen to hurt Dafa and his own future. I wished that we could have talked together so I could help him see the special chance he had to position himself to be a good person. I hope he realizes the truth before it's too late.