Journey to Find the Fa - Written for "World Falun Dafa Day"
(Clearwisdom.net) May 13 is again getting close. All practitioners know the significance of this day, because on this day in 1951, our revered Teacher came into this world again, and on this day in 1992 he first introduced Dafa to the public. May 13 is therefore "World Falun Dafa Day." As a Dafa practitioner, I look back on my journey to seek and begin studying the Fa. I deeply feel Master's boundless graciousness, which helped me to seize the opportunity that does not come along in 10,000 years and become a disciple of Dafa.
Looking back at my childhood, I was a naughty boy and often played the role of "leader." I often did ridiculous things to "uphold justice." Being a naughty boy, however, I also had lots of weird and strange thoughts. I often stared at the moon on a clear night and thought, "Where do people come from, and why do we live? Is it true that there is nothing after people pass away and they won't know anything after they die? Then why were they born into this world in the first place? If they didn't come, wouldn't they be spared the pain of death?" Of course, I couldn't find the answers even though I thought very hard about it.
Because I lived in an environment ruled by the wicked Communist Party, I accepted more and more evil Party theories as I grew up. My answers to the old questions became, "Fighting for the realization of Communism is the meaning of human existence," and atheism became my criterion by which to judge things.
During my youth I read books written by Marx, Lenin, and Mao Zedong with fanatic zeal. I even chewed through Das Capital, all in the name of "seeking the truth." When I probed deeper, however, I thought, "Even if everyone could live well, they would still indulge in sensual pleasures throughout their lives, and turn into dust after they die like they do now, so what's the point?" My questions about the meaning of life remained unanswered.
If gods and ghosts don't exist, where did all the historic fairy tales, folklore, and ghost stories come from? Using Materialism's Reflection Theory to explain these stories would also be self-contradictory, because how could gods and ghosts be reflected in literary works and folklore without objective material existence? When I was young I worked as part of a "Four Clean-ups Work Team" in the countryside. I dealt with an old woman whose deceased son had taken over her body and demanded offerings. With atheism as the dominant theory in my mind, I decided the old woman was mentally ill. I told the doctor to give her medications, injections, and acupuncture, none of which worked. The old woman protested but with the voice of a man. After I talked with "him" and promised to fulfill his demands, the problem quickly went away. This phenomenon could not be explained with Marxist theories, and it was a heavy blow to the atheism in my mind, which also called my attention to the issue of whether living beings exist in other dimensions.
In the middle of the Cultural Revolution, a wave of qigong frenzy swept through China. In the early 1980s, I became highly interested in discussing issues related to qigong, because some supernatural phenomena that appeared in qigong practice led me to think that qigong was the answer to many of my questions, and it was a solution to my illness-ridden wife's problems. My bookshelf was then filled with all kinds of qigong books. I could boast that I owned basically everything written about qigong that people could find at bookstores and street vendors. I studied and practiced several different types of qigong, but I didn't find the answers I needed, and I didn't continue to practice. I just wasted a lot of money.
One day in May 1995, I walked into a small bookstore as usual. I saw a prominently displayed new book, Zhuan Falun, sitting on the shelf right after I entered the room. When I picked up the book I suddenly felt touched and hastily flipped through it. I rushed to buy it right after I read the index. I sensed that all of the answers I was looking for were inside this book. That evening I thought I would read for a little while and then turn off the light and sleep as usual, but I ended up reading Zhuan Falun until daybreak and finishing it. Although I didn't realize the importance of this book at that time, I knew the book answered the questions I had had for many years, the questions for which I had racked my brain but still could not find answers.
Master's answers are so simple and clear. Where do humans come from?
"...a person's earliest life comes from the universe." (Zhuan Falun)
Why did people come here?
"One should return to one's original, true self; this is the real purpose of being human." (Zhuan Falun)
What's the truth behind the life and death of human beings?
"One's Primordial Spirit does not become extinct...." "...when a person is dead, only the largest molecular elements in this dimension of ours have sloughed off, while the bodies in other dimensions are not degenerated." ("Lecuture One" from Zhuan Falun, 2000 translation)
Then I truly realized the meaning of the phrase "true teaching is but one sentence" while "sham talks fill 10,000 books." That was an accurate description of a whole shelf of qigong books I had then. As I improved through subsequent cultivation, I spent lots of time getting rid of my numerous qigong books. I also had a small piece of parchment paper with the word "Buddha" written on it. A quack qigong master who went everywhere teaching people to cure illnesses had demanded 2,000 yuan for it. I wanted to use it to help my father-in-law who had suffered a relapse of stomach cancer, but he passed away anyway. My experiences made me aware that I had taken a great detour in the process of looking for the Fa.
I realized the true meaning of life after I obtained Zhuan Falun, because this book helped me to truly cultivate myself. Later, my wife, son, and mother-in-law also joined this bright path, and now my two young grandsons also practice Falun Gong. Four generations in my family practice Falun Gong. Everything seems to have started with my finding the book Zhuan Falun just by chance, but in fact it was not a coincidence.
The strange thoughts I had as a young child and the seeking as an adult were all answered through the study of Teacher's above lecture. In fact, it was my knowing side that was looking for the Fa. In September 1998 I finally met Teacher, whom I always thought of after I obtained the Fa, for the first time. I was fortunate enough to listen to Teacher's lecture and encouragement in person. From that moment on I strengthened my determination that I would cultivate until the end, reach Consummation, and return with Teacher.
When dark clouds billowed in the days following July 20, 1999, my wife and I repeatedly studied the Fa and remembered Teacher's words and how we obtained the Fa, to affirm our determination! We have followed Teacher to this day, step by step, and we will certainly walk to the end of the path!